I'm over 40 years old and was diagnosed with ADHD as an adult.

I've spent many years trying to achieve job stability, but I've been fired from multiple jobs. These experiences have taken a serious toll on my mental health, confidence, and self-esteem.

It's not because of a lack of effort or willingness to work. I genuinely want to work, contribute, and do my job well. I always try my hardest, but I struggle with attention, working memory, impulsivity, and handling pressure.

One of my biggest difficulties is how I react when something goes wrong. When I make a mistake, I become extremely anxious and feel an overwhelming urge to fix it immediately. Instead of slowing down and thinking clearly, I sometimes become overwhelmed, freeze up, or make even more mistakes.

Over time, this has created a vicious cycle. Every time I start a new job, I'm afraid of making mistakes, disappointing others, and eventually losing my job again. That fear makes me even more anxious, which affects my performance.

I'm receiving professional treatment and actively working on improving my coping strategies, but I'm mentally and emotionally exhausted.

The hardest part is that I genuinely want a stable working life. I want to feel capable, independent, and useful. But after so many unsuccessful attempts, I'm starting to question whether I'll ever be able to maintain long-term employment.

I'm particularly interested in hearing from adults who were diagnosed later in life and have experienced similar employment difficulties.

For those of you who have struggled with repeated job losses due to ADHD, what has helped you find and maintain stable employment?

Have certain types of jobs, workplace accommodations, treatments, or coping strategies made a meaningful difference?

I'd really appreciate hearing about your experiences, especially from people over 40 who have managed to find some stability.

Thank you for taking the time to read this.

I’ve been on adderall for about 7 years now. I work an Office/corporate desk job. I noticed that my medicine makes me insanely productive during work. I’ll push to get as much done as possible, and I’ll be very efficient, productive and good with time management. Weird thing to complain about right? However, I noticed recently that I might be a little…too focused? To the point where I am taking very few breaks during the day. I get so locked in that I forget to drink water. I am sitting for most of the day and rarely stand up to stretch. Now I’m having body aches and pains from the prolonged sitting. I get so locked in and focused that I neglect my own wellbeing. I was wondering if anyone has any tips or tricks for this. How do I “snap out of it” once my medication kicks in and I enter the zone? How do I make sure I can be focused and productive at work while also making sure I’m taking lots of breaks, eating, etc. I recently started a lower dose but am wondering if I should go even lower? If you can relate to this- Please let me know what works for you!

i rarely see people talk about the guilt you experience just existing with this disorder. it's so debilitating, I cannot accomplish anything. im 18 and my mother who has always provided for me and given her all is suffering because im struggling to do basic tasks, forgetting short-term important details, and cannot get off my phone. i sit here, having not showered yesterday, took 5 hours to enter the shower while sitting on the toilet, I haven't eaten, I can't arrange my bed, I can't clean my room, I can't do anything. and when I finally end up forcing myself out of this state, it feels so forced, so robotic and unnatural. im so disheartened by the state in which my life is in.

26F- Has anyone developed heart palpitations and shortness of breath after years of taking stimulants without issues?

My symptoms seem to worsen with stimulants but still occur on medication-free days. I’m currently undergoing cardiac testing and wondering whether stimulants could be contributing.

I’m curious whether adding another medication, like guanfacine, could help. Has anyone used it as an adjunct to stimulants and noticed an improvement in palpitations or other cardiovascular side effects?

Have any other medications helped counteract the cardiovascular effects of stimulants? Or has switching to a non-stimulant ADHD medication worked better for you?

I’d especially appreciate hearing from anyone who developed these symptoms after years of stimulant use and found a medication approach that worked for them.

Does anyone have any advice on getting through engineering with ADHD without meds? In fact, has anyone ever done this before and would like to share their tips or stories?

Basically I’m not formally diagnosed because my parents don’t believe in stuff like this, and I’m on their insurance (also it’s embarrassing to ask them about it). But teachers throughout my life have been recommending me to get checked. Im also the typical “gifted kid” like probably a lot of people on this sub but that has allowed me to get through high school with a high gpa because I’m great at cramming of course.

Even if I were to get diagnosed and probably wouldn’t want to get on stimulants because a family history of heart issues. But genuinely…HOW DO I SURVIVE…😭 College classes are really nothing like high school and procrastinating has a huge negative effect compared to a minuscule one before😭. I’ve tried all the stupid hacks to stop, I’ve tried mindfulness, lists, pomodoro but nothing works. Heck I can’t even pay attention in class at all😔

Anyone else have absolutely zero patience for video game dialogue that comes one line at a time?

It drives me insane. Unless the story is genuinely compelling or my choices actually affect what happens, I just can’t sit through it.

A lot of mobile games are especially bad about this. They’ll have pages and pages of dialogue, but instead of letting me read it all at once, I have to keep tapping through each individual line. For example, games like genshin impact, where winds meet, etc, and their style of games are just so annoying to read through. Even the “choices” they offer just lead to the same outcome.

At that point, I’d rather they just put the whole conversation on the screen like a book so I can read it at my own pace instead of constantly waiting and clicking.

Games I can absolutely sit through are like Baldur’s gate 3 and the mass effect and Dragon Age series. Games where the choices are real.

Curious if anyone has had the experience of having amphetamines (any formulation, doesn't matter) fail to relieve ADHD symptoms but had something else (e.g., methylphenidate, wellbutrin, strattera, whatever) actually help?

And just to be clear I'm not talking about when the amphetamine adjustment/honeymoon phase passes and you no longer feel that initial subjective boost/mild euphoria. I'm talking they literally do not help your cognitive symptoms at all, or you just feel worse on them than on other meds. Figure this doesn't happen too often but curious to hear if anyone has had that experience.

Edit: I'm aware that different people react differently to different meds, finding the right med requires trial and error, etc. No need to reply if that's all you're going to say.

Am I alone in this? They are designed for people with sensory issues but I have to be completely silent whilst wearing them or I can’t stand it. I also talk too quiet and no one can hear me. Really feeling like that ‘you people can’t do anything’ post with this

I usually wear my AirPod pro max because they are great for noise cancelling but then people think you’re rude, they’re also insanely heavy , anyone know of any loop alternatives that don’t do this? Clutching at straws I know

I need help my girlfriend has severe adhd the doctors she was seen have said she has one of the worst cases of adhd they’ve seen. We are both in college and I want to be able to help her with classes staying on top of school work and making sure she goes to classes. Some weeks it’s real easy for her to and other is not same with the school work. I want to be able to help I just not sure how. My second ask for advice is sometime she lashes out when she gets stressed. She always apologizes the second have she snaps at me an I know it’s how her brain is wired but some days it hurts a lot getting yelled at. I need help trying to fully understand what it like to live with adhd because I know I never will be able to and any tips people would have to help

Looking for science-backed, practical self-improvement books that offer actionable advice on sleep, health, motivation, discipline, neuroplasticity, stress management, focus, memory, longevity, and overall well-being. I want to understand what to do, how to do it, and why it works, with an emphasis on reliable scientific evidence, realistic claims, and advice that genuinely motivates me to take action. Open to books covering either multiple topics or individual areas.

Second year of university. Most classes I'm in are retakes of the first years classes because I was mentally fucked for the whole first year.

Already failed one course.

I have support, I have people who are helping me, I'm on papers I am technically on fucking sick leave. Yet still I'm just a stupid idiot and can't get anything done.

I just loathe myself. I loathe my existence. It feels that my existence is just to be a nuisance to those around me.

I have no plans. I have no deams. I often fall asleep wishing for the sweet release of death, so that this conscious torment may finally come to an end.

I used to feel shame. But nowadays when I'm faced with failure I feel nothing. Inside my head I want to kick and screams. But to the outside world I just seem mildly infuriated.

I'm so lost. Fuck

Hello! Recently diagnosed (25M), started on Dexamphetamine 5mg morning + 5mg lunch. Been taking them for 1 week. Things are going great so far but I’m finding that in the afternoon my jaw gets a bit tight and I start clenching my teeth together. (It starts roughly 2 hrs after the lunch dose)

I have a GP appointment in a week and psychiatrist in 3 weeks but in the mean time I was wondering if anyone had the same experience and any advice? Is it the type of medication? Dose related? Will it pass as my body adjusts?

Thanks!!

20F, i got prescribed inspiral 5mg and am supposed to start the dosage day after tomorrow. (3 weeks 5mg 5 days a week, then revisit)

but i’m scared because this is my first time getting on adhd meds and i m having all kinds of thoughts like

- imposter syndrome because i am not hyperactive which is very big in adhd but i’m fairly okay on that one, i dont struggle w anxiety , instead i never get anxious, scared or even have 0 eustress which causes me to not /e scared of reckless behavior or not even study/ work even out of worry or anxiety. instead i hyperfocus, get distracted easily, procrastinate, and have impulsive behaviours (not with intent of sh) so i m constantly feeling like do i really need it bad enough?

- i m worried about dependency on the med and i really don’t wanna be addicted to another thing 🙏🙏🙏

- how does it react when u drink alcohol or smoke during its course?

ik i may sound stupid but i m vv new to this adhd meds thing and itll be great if someone could answer my questions. i never went to get diagnosed with intention on getting on meds but it just happened and i decided to finally do it because i have my exams since mid nov and i want to see the difference from when i normally have exam szn approaching and going on normally as compared to on meds.

Has anyone had this experience ? The meds seem
To work great for 4 hours then just slowly wear off and i am exhausted. I take 20mg of generic so I’m wondering if it has anything to do with that? I will be trying 30 mg next week. I have heard of people splitting doses to twice a day ?

Hi everyone, I was diagnosed with ADHD two months ago, and I’m currently studying mechanical engineering at university. I’ve struggled with ADHD symptoms my entire life, but my parents were against medication. Looking back, I feel like untreated ADHD robbed me of my childhood and education.

Throughout primary school, I was placed in special education because I struggled academically, especially with math. My teachers always told me to try harder, but they never understood that I genuinely was trying. I just couldn’t concentrate. I was constantly daydreaming, and no matter how hard I tried, my brain never seemed to be present.
Recently, my psychiatrist had me take a WAIS intelligence test, and I scored 76. That number has completely destroyed my confidence. I was extremely stressed during the test, physically shaking, and unable to think clearly, but I still can’t stop thinking about that score.

Now, whenever I struggle with something in engineering, my brain immediately tells me, “You’re stupid. Your IQ is only 76. That’s why you can’t understand this.” It’s heartbreaking because I genuinely put so much effort into studying, yet sometimes it takes me hours to understand something that others seem to learn quickly.
I’ve been taking ADHD medication for two months, and the difference has been night and day. I can finally concentrate and actually enjoy learning, but I still carry years of feeling unintelligent.

I genuinely want to become a mechanical engineer, but I’m starting to doubt whether I’m capable of succeeding. I’m constantly fighting against my own thoughts, and it’s mentally exhausting.

Has anyone with ADHD experienced something similar? Has anyone received a low IQ score but still succeeded academically? What study techniques helped you, and how did you overcome constantly feeling unintelligent?
I don’t want to give up on my dream. I just want to stop letting one number define what I believe I’m capable of achieving. Any advice would mean a lot.

I have a monthly task where I need to check on someone else’s work, and it needs to be submitted by the end of the month. My workload is given to my by my manager and I have a little flexibility in how I tackle it, but mostly it’s pretty rigid. If I tell them I need less I might get one fewer task a day or a day to catch up but it’s a constant grind.

This check is handed out usually in the start of the second week of the month - let’s say 8th, and is due a few days before the end of the month, let’s say 28th. Handing it in before that deadline is still treated as “late” though, because they want it earlier (which does beg the question of why even have that deadline then but I digress).

This task is dependent on other people having done their work. First week, I don’t know what I’ll be assigned to check, so I can’t do anything. Second week, most of the time there’s nothing been done to check on 8th.

I have, so far, put weekly time in my calendar to check what work has been submitted and to then do this task but this isn’t taken into account by my manager handing out work so I just ignore it at this point, because I’m too busy doing my daily work to check on stuff.

I think the 3rd week is the sweet spot, but does anyone have advice on the following:
1. Setting reminders that will actually trigger that urgency in my mind to do the check.
2. Advocating to my manager that they actually need to give me protected time to get this task done.
3. Any advice on how to word it if I have too much to do on the day I have that protected time and won’t be able to get everything done if I do my checks of other work?

Curious what you all find works. I can sometimes get so much done (depending on the type of thing) when the random fixation strikes beyond the false progress stage, meaning I'll get fixated on one of my hobbies but instead of engaging I will sit there reading or watching others do it on YouTube. Or even worse, I'll research gear to buy for it and get a false feeling of moving forward thinking once I get xyz I'll eventually do the thing.

The times I successfully do are more project/activity based, like a home project of revamping my living space after not organizing for weeks. Eventually I either start doing a small task in that wheelhouse and then I'm all out doing it all. I guess the payoff is more immediate there, compared to creating a song or film. When it's a song or film, it's an instant pull of resistance and reverting to doom scrolling for hours for example.

Most of the time it's all in shambles and I sit around longing to do the thing I want to do, if I can only just do it.

So do you remain in these patterns and strike when the fixation is hot enough? Or do you try a behavior training approach, even when you are your own worst enemy and powerless to it? I roll my eyes when I'm told to just show up and do the smallest task, but I have never really done that repeatedly to know or not.

I need more than anything right now to break through. Lost the external structure of a full time job, and I have a window right now to make the things I've been longing for but I'm stuck at square one repeating patterns. It sucks

I'm in my 40s, married with kids, and have spent around 17 years in sales. Sometimes I wonder how I've reached this stage of life and still feel so far from where I wanted to be. It feels like I've somehow stumbled into everything I've achieved without really earning it.

I've been interested in tech since school. I watched friends get into it and always envied them, but never had the drive to pursue it. Looking back, I've just taken whatever bus came along without deciding where I wanted to go.

Now I want to move into Tech and maybe build something of my own. I spend hours researching courses, tools and possibilities, imagining what I could do. But when the actual work starts, I freeze. The confusion, self-doubt and boring practice get to me. I procrastinate, jump to another idea and repeat the cycle. I've paid for courses I never finished. More than once.

It's affecting other parts of my life too. I'm overweight, my kids look up to me but I worry I'm letting them down, and my wife is understandably frustrated when I don't follow through on what I promise. I barely have a social life because I'm awkward around people and often assume they don't like me. At work, I feel I'm doing the bare minimum and could be let go any time.

I make plans, get excited, do very little, then feel guilty and start again. I'm honestly tired of being this version of myself, but even that realisation hasn't changed much.

I'm not looking for motivational quotes or another productivity hack.

Has anyone genuinely been like this in their 40s and managed to turn things around? Not just for a few weeks, but for good. What actually changed? How did you break a pattern you'd repeated for years?

I have been hearing lots of people talk about it recently.

Vyvanse originally made me feel like Superman for like 3 months, but now, it gives me energy still, but it comes with anxiety and a racing heart rate

Someone told me modafinil doesn’t have the euphoric buzz stims have, it is also very smooth and doesn’t cause debilitating anxiety and jitters.

Anyone have experience with it?

Hey all!

So I've been struggling with this for the past few months. I feel like I see a lot of discussion around pretty much every other aspect of living with ADHD, but I feel like I don't see a lot of people talking about the feelings I've been going through.

I am 31 now, diagnosed 5 or so years ago. At first, I took the non medication steps - meditation, etc. but eventually went with stimulants, which has been one of the greatest decisions of my life.

However. medication and lifestyle changes can't change brain chemistry. While I've learned coping mechanisms and systems to fortify a healthy, productive lifestyle, that little black hole is always still there, fighting against every effort I make to pursue a normal, functional life.

No matter what I do, how much effort I put in, it always feels like the ADHD is winning. It takes so much effort to feel like I can function on the same level as anyone else. Regular social interactions feel exhausting. My peers work 9-5 jobs without complaints, meanwhile I feel exhausted after working for 2 hours.

I feel that I am doing all that I can to compensate for all of this, through medication and meditation, but the weight of everything recently feels crushing.

I've found myself in a near constant state of anger and irritability. I'm so frustrated about everything my life has become. I'm so frustrated that I describe my problems to my friends, only to be met with "Oh yeah, we all feel that way sometimes".

How do you guys deal with the anger/frustration of living this way without anybody to talk to? I have never been a generally angry person, but I feel so trapped inside of myself that there are a lot of negative emotions bubbling up and affecting the people in my life.

I have tried to apply to everything as an adult SMI DDD and all of them told me no you are not struggling enough to make it, not being able to shower for six months straight, not being able to pick up the phone and make phone calls, I used to be valedictorian, in the last five years I’ve been on my own with no support. Everything has fallen apart peace by peace.

Hey everyone, i got diagnosed with adhd last year and since then i have tried ritalin and strattera. I started off with Ritalin but was not given much direction with it and i felt that it made my brain fog 10X worse and overall just didnt seem to help much so i asked to try something else but the psychiatrist i was seeing wanted me to pay $1000 just for a medication review. Because i couldnt afford it, my doctor put me on strattera which seemes to help for a little while but i could only take it at night because of side effects which then interrupted my sleep pretty bad so i eventually stopped taking it. For those of you who are on meds, what meds did you find to work for you? What do they do for you? And is it worth paying the $1000 to get a review? TIA

Hi, I was on concerta since elementary school and recently switched to azstarys. I’ve been feeling headaches and hot so far. Started last week on the first dose and felt nothing was happening so my doctor moved me to the second to last dose to try. I was feeling extreme brain fog on concerta and I couldn’t follow what my teacher was saying in class at all. Any tips would be appreciated. Anyone feel brain fog, shut down and like a zombie on concerta?