This is really stupid, i feel embarrassed even posting this lol! I didn't even drink the whole thing, i just sipped a few sips from it. I'm only freaking out because i'm a water drinker, and the coffee i had, i added oatmilk and a little coffee creamer, now i'm freaking out and regretting it because it was slightly sweetened. I just wanted to wake up a bit and not feel so brainfogged. How do i just go about my day and not give a fuck?

TW!! There is no tag for actually upsetting topic but trigger warning

I was diagnosed with anorexia back in March and I have been in outpatient recovery since then. But I am so resistant to recovery. I have an eating plan but I still hide food when I can. I don't want to put in the effort to recover. There's no point. Why should I put in the effort for a life I hardly want? The eating disorder has got me out of school, that's great. It has stopped me from seeing my dad which is even better. And if anything, I've developed closer friendships in the last few months than ever before. Everybody is waiting for something to click inside me but I don't think it's going to. And when it does, I'll probably act on my suicidal thoughts. I actually like my body now. I really fucking love it. I love it so much. I don't want to change it. Why should I? I'm not even suffering from any health complications from it. For once I actually like myself and now they're forcing me to change

Really struggling with eating more food daily and constantly fall short of calorie targets because I get scared to have snacks to top me up on calories as I don’t track my macros so don’t feel like it’s okay for me eat snacks so restrict the amount I can have

I guess what I’m asking is in eating disorder recovery just how much does macros matter or is it just the case of eat whatever you can to hit goals no matter when or what?

Any advice and tips would be amazing

I've been recovering from long-ish-term malnutrition for around six months. And I've mostly gotten past the psychological issues of eating and am now working on regaining my appetite. I want to be getting the proper amounts of nutrients without overdoing of course in this stage. And educating myself on the nutrients i should be giving myself has been beneficial for my recovery somehow (maybe because it feels like progress im not sure) so i looked into getting a nutritionist or someone like that and i just can't afford it. Especially after the therapy i practically put myself in debt to get better. So I need alternative ways to stay on track. ive been looking into different apps but I'm not sure if thats a good method for this type of thing. so if anyone has advice on either an app or some way I can do this without bankruptcy, that would be nice.

I'm in outpatient recovery for anorexia and my mum has decided that she has given up making my meals because I'm being so difficult about them. I told her I'm doing all this for attention so she has decided giving me no more attention will make me get my shit together. Now I feel like I need to do something worse to get her attention back

I have had multiple eating disorders since I was 14 (I'm 24 now) and this year has gotten so much worse mentally. I developed the fear of having food in my stomach and the fear of my stomach digesting food. When I eat I feel awful mentally, just so much sadness, fear and disappointment. I usually go days without eating until I just can't anymore and I eat, then I have the awful mental torture. I just don't know what to do anymore it's been bad for like a month now but I haven't lost weight (I have been the same weight for a year now) and I also fear that when I eat I will automatically gain weight. Has anyone experienced something like this? I just want to get rid of this fear because it's running my life but at the same time I fear weight gain (last year I gained a bit of weight and I had awful panic attacks because of it) and I don't know what to do anymore.

I'm 28 and I started 1 month ago to have some negative and compulsive thoughts. I don't have a bad relationship with my body and I'm not a disciplined person, actually I'm the opposite, but since I started a restrictive diet I feel like finally I can be that girl who is oriented to the goal. I don't care if it's unhealthy. I just want to reduce the intake until when I'll have total control on my body and my temptations.

I wonder if someone relates with these thoughts...

Hi everyone. I've recently come to the realization that I need to seek help for an eating disorder. At first it was "fine" but now I struggle with my physical strength, memory loss, and other cognitive issues. Where do I even begin to start seeking help? I've been struggling with this for the past five years and I'm beginning to fear I've caused irreversible damage to myself. Any help at all is appreciated!

I struggle with my weight and comes that is binge eating that I do, it’s incredibly embarrassing and unfortunately I binge on stuff that is of course unhealthy. The problem is when I try to get better and eat better I can’t, I just don’t enjoy the food and I feel miserable. How can I get over that? Why do I even experience that feeling? I feel defeated every time I try and fail again after telling people around me I’ll get better.

I feel crazy :C does anyone else struggle with this?

for reference we have been together for 7 years, also married.

he’s been unfaithful, cheating, aswell as his likes have always revolved around underweight girls.

I relapsed in my recovering due to infidelity, the thought of being at a certain weight is all I can think about. i’ve expressed this to him aswell, and he honestly encourages it, without saying it. he knows i’ve been in an active relapse, he even comments about how I am looking better. he has not once encouraged or tried to help me, there is alot more to this story but i’m keeping it vague lol… i just simply have to know if anyone has gone through this?

I have had disordered eating for the past few years but i cant tell if i have a disorder and should seek out help. So for as long as i can remember i have had body image issues (body dysmorphia and such) but i never really thought that was out of the ordinary, Im still in high school and very insecure. But this year i met the only person i have ever felt close enough to talk to about how i find my reflection repulsing and how i used to binge then purge a lot. I know its bad for me and i have recovered so much sense the worst of it, but when i tell him these things he becomes really concerned. I love my boyfriend and he's the only person i feel close enough to talk to about it but idk how to stop body checking and calorie counting. I don't know if i need to go see like a therapist or something i don't really trust dietitians (my mom is one and she kinda started the disordered eating habits for me at least) should i go see a professional for this. I didn't know it was that bad. if i could get some advice that would be amazing.

I know that eating disorders are just a delicate subject, so I was wondering if a dietitian was more harm than help in some cases

Hi everybody, a few weeks ago I was at the lowest point of my ED and with a severely low BMI. I had to be hospitalised and my doctors had to include a very high calorie meal plan to help me regain weight. Now , a lot of these calories come from simple sugars such as biscuits , cakes juice and ice cream that I have to eat everyday. I appreciate the weight gain meal plan but I observed that over the weeks my hair has become drier and more frizzy . This makes me really concerned as I was really hoping to get better hair post recovery but I don’t know if it’s being caused by sugar or not. I’ve read sugar causes inflammation and am wondering if it’s the sugar that’s making my hair frizzier because it used to be a lot less frizzy before starting the meal plan. Could anyone please help me with what might be going on, I haven’t changed my shampoo/conditioning routine , and am a little concerned as I hoped to get better hair post recovery.
Thanks so much