Since I still mourn the fact that I lost you.

That I continue to play the songs that remind me of you, even if these weren’t my thing. And it feels like a punishment yet solace that it remind me of the days that I was with you.

That I cannot seem to let go of my old car since it reminds me of the nights that I was beside of you.

And I continue to look on the places that remind me of you, hoping one day our paths cross again.

I may have used the word “remind” too much huh? Haha. Probably because, that’s the best thing that I can do for myself: to do the things, even when painful, that make me remember you.

My silence never meant moving on. It was me giving you the space that your soul deserves to heal and to completely let go.

I pray that one day this will eventually be a one-sided affair, where you have completely moved on while I completely mourn our what-ifs in perpetuity.

You are probably my loss that I will regret for the rest of my life. And I think I might have deserved it for all the wrongs that I have done.

I hope that I get another chance with you.. in another lifetime.

Just wanted to share a piece of my diary entry

Today is august 22nd 2026, 2:13am and I’m typing this..
It’s getting harder to move on each passing day. I see you almost every day, and you have that look in your eyes as if i meant nothing to you.
I see our chats and pictures together and remember only the times we spent and thats more than enough to bring me to tears.
I wonder everyday if you think about me at least once in a day… well i doubt that but that’s not for me to think.
I wonder if what you felt for me was ever true or it was just one of your greatest acts that you put across.
What i felt for you was very genuine, I’ll give you that. I decide to never cry for you ever again but i just can’t. Thinking about you just changes my mood and this happens at the most random time of the day.
I’ll be enjoying my day then suddenly *poof* a thought of you crosses my mind and i go blank.
I dont know how long I’ll be in this state or phase but i really wanna get over it cuz i very well know that you dont give 2 flying fucks about me anymore…

Today is october 22nd 2026 7:51pm and I’m typing this..
I’m starting to think less about you but you never completely cease to exist in my mind. I still think about you at the most random times and i think how different it would have been if you had liked me back. That’s a parallel universe story lol.
I still remember your soft smile you give when i talked to you, the soft eyes you had, the yap session you used to do everyday.. goddamn i miss it.
I miss you.

I wish we could go back to what we were but I’m very well aware that we can’t cuz you just don’t feel the same about me. idek if my feelings are valid anymore. Idek if I’m loveable anymore.
But it’s okay. I’ll get through it. It’s just a phase…

I don't know who to say this to, so I'm just sending it to the wind.

I have done a lot of good in my life. I helped and saved people. I have been a confidant. I have been someone's hope. I have been a lover. I have been a hand that reached out.

Is it unfair of me to ask for just a few close friends to call my own? How is it so easy for me to attract so many surface-level friends, and not close ones? Is it a difficult ask to be remembered, included, and checked on?

I know the good that I can do. I know the lengths that I'll go through for the people who mattered. I know that I'll avoid being a burden, and only do what I can to give. Amidst the things that I am, a capable and fun person outside, why am I struggling this much to find my people?

I have always been that friend that each group forgets about. I know because I remember good parts of my life where I had people - just never ones that actually sticks. No fights nor disagreements happened, only time did.

I am getting tired looking. I knew solitude too well already, and I've done my part diverting my energy elsewhere. Maybe one of these days, I will forget and resume being a high-functioning person.

For now, I ask: is this really too much of an ask?

Best,

I want to experience April, May, June and July with you again. We can include August if you can be just be you, minus the condescending tone. We can skip September as long as we reunite in October. I bet it’s gonna be sweeter the second time around as they say.

I want it, I want it, I want you.

But November looms over us and it always goes too fast for my liking. It seems to take the days before I’ve had enough of them. I haven’t had enough of you yet.

But all you say is that we’re both busy, that we let our worlds grow small. Boy, you should’ve seen my heart. Honest to all the gods, I thought we were making room for more. Now I’m making peace with the distance. We’ve become almost strangers on separate shores.

I hate it, I hate it, I hate-

No, I don’t even wanna acknowledge it.

So let’s go back to April when time was slower and time we had for each other was more. If you want to. I could ask you but I go over again and again what you said about making our world small…So maybe I shouldn’t. There’s enough space between us now. But we wouldn’t have allowed that in April.

Tine, halos mag dalawang taon na. Kamusta ka na? Ok ka lang ba? Sumagi ka lang sa isipan ko lately. I hope maayos lahat sa buhay mo ngayon. Last i checked, naka block pa din ako sa messenger. So there is no way para magkausap ulit tayo. Di naman dahil gusto kita makausap pa ulit. I guess na mi-miss lang kita. Kung ano man dahilan mo bakit mo pinutol ang ugnayan natin, hindi naman kinasama ng loob ko. Sa isip ko baka pino protektahan mo lang din ang Well being or yung peace mo. And im fine with that. Kung makikita mo man to, at napag tanto mong ako to, wag ka na mag dm. Andito na tayo. Baka eto talaga kapalaran natin. Basta iingatan mo lang ang sarili mo lagi. Saan ka man mapadpad lagi mong uunahin sarili mo. Wish you all the best Tine. Paalam.

You know, I always saw you as someone who was grounded. Someone who knew what he wanted and stood by what he believed in. You were my “begin again,” and you know that. After everything that happened with my ex, I was so scared to fall in love again. But when I got with you, I didn't just fall in love—I chose to take that chance, even though I knew there was a possibility that I'd get hurt. And despite all my fears, I still chose you.

Sobrang sakit lang na you chose to believe other people over me. I didn't actually want to end our relationship, tbh. I just wanted some time off to process everything that had happened, pero I accidentally said, “Let's break up,” even though every part of me never wanted to be away from you. It was a dumb decision, and I regretted it. I wanted a cool-off, not a breakup. Pero what's done is done, and I can't change what already happened.

And the fact na, after a while, you eventually realized that what you initially believed about me wasn't even true. That hurts, too, because by the time you realized it, so much had already happened between us. I wish you had given me the chance to explain myself and prove my side before things got to the point where we couldn't go back anymore. Kasi what hurts the most is knowing na maybe things could've been different if you had just trusted me enough to hear me out.

What I couldn't comprehend, though, was how we weren't even two months into being broken up, and you were already courting someone else. Well, not exactly someone new pala, since you two were already friends. I just wasn't aware of that until I saw na nag-uusap kayo. You never even told me that you were friends. And finding out na you were already pursuing her not even two months after we broke up hurt more than I could explain.

Kasi habang ikaw, you were already opening your heart to someone else, ako, I was still learning how to eat properly again. I was still trying to process everything and figure out how to live without you. Andaming lalaking gustong kumilala sa akin, but I couldn't bring myself to entertain any of them. Kasi paano mo kayang mag-entertain ng bago when all you've known and wanted for so long was one person? How could I even try to get to know someone else when a part of me was still holding on to what we had? And that's why it hurts so much, bab.

And what's worse is that I had to find out from other people na hinatid-sundo mo pa siya, and she even gets to sit in the front seat of your car. The same front seat na even your own family doesn't usually sit in when I'm there, and even your friends don't get that kind of treatment. I don't know if you realize how much that hurts, but it does. Kasi it's not just about her sitting in the front seat or you driving her around. It's about the little things that used to make me feel special, the things I thought were just between us, suddenly becoming things you could do for someone else.

And the fact na sa iba ko pa nalalaman makes it hurt even more. I never wanted to feel like I was easily replaceable, especially by someone I spent so long choosing. I guess it's painful realizing that the things I once thought were special to us weren't as exclusive as I believed them to be. Maybe to you, they're just little things, but to me, they meant so much because they came from you. And seeing you do those things for someone else, especially so soon after we ended, made me question whether what we had really meant the same to both of us.

I always thought you were someone who stood by his decisions, someone who knew what he wanted and wouldn't just give up on something that mattered to him. Maybe that's why I held on for so long, because I genuinely believed that if things ever got difficult between us, you'd still choose us. I thought that even if things got messy, even if we misunderstood each other, we'd at least try to work things out before giving up.

But now, I know you're making a conscious decision not to be with me anymore. And as much as it hurts to accept, I can't keep holding on to someone who's already choosing a different path.

I still love you, a lot. I still care about you more than you probably realize. Pero I don't think I'm INLOVE with you anymore. Or maybe I'm just slowly learning how to live without the version of you that I fell in love with. Kasi sometimes, I miss you, but I also remember everything that hurt me. And I keep reminding myself na if you cared about us as much as I did, maybe I wouldn't be feeling this way right now. Maybe things would've turned out differently if we had both wanted to fight for what we had.

And don't get me wrong, I'm not saying you weren't allowed to move on. We were broken up, and you had every right to make your own decisions. I just wish you understood how painful it was for me to watch you start something new while I was still trying to pick myself up after losing you. I guess we just weren't hurting in the same way, or maybe we were never on the same page anymore.

Thank you, bab. For two years, ikaw yung ginusto ko. Two years of liking you, of wondering what it would be like to finally have you, and of choosing to take the risk despite being scared to fall in love again. And for one whole year, I got to call you mine. One year of loving you, choosing you, and experiencing what it was like to finally have the person I'd wanted for so long. You were my “begin again,” and I'll always be grateful that I took that chance on you, even if things didn't turn out the way I hoped they would.

Pero hanggang dito na lang siguro, no? Hahaha. Maybe it's time I start choosing myself, too. Maybe it's time I stop waiting for someone who's already made his decision and finally accept that some things aren't meant to be fixed, no matter how much you want them to be.

I wanted it to be you. I really did. And I think that's what makes all of this so painful. Because you weren't just someone I loved. You were someone I had to convince myself to take a chance on after everything I'd been through. You were the person who made me believe that maybe loving someone again wouldn't be so scary after all. And for a while, you made me feel like taking that risk was worth it.

But I can't keep holding on to the person you were to me while ignoring the reality of who you're choosing to be now.

For two years, I liked you. For one year, I got to love you as mine. And even if I don't get to love you anymore, I'll always be glad that, for a while, I got to call you my “begin again.”

I just wish that, for once, you had chosen to begin again with me, too:)

Halloween came in early for me.

It’s been 2 weeks… I miss you.

But you’re ghosting me right now. And I guess this is the most obvious reason for me to just stop.

Stop hoping.
Stop believing.
Stop expecting.
Just stop, self.

Its been more than 6 weeks of no communication.

I still miss you. Parang its really hard to find someone like You here in Reddit ha.

.if only maerncounter kita ulit, il be nicer, kind, etc.

I wasnt able to tell you how much i like you and im really lucky to have you around. Kahit busy ako sa mga duty ko dati, kung alam.mo lang willing ako mg make up duty :) anyway sana lumipas din ito..

I just still miss you lang.

​

I'm not sure if it's the weather or just one of those random days when memories come rushing back, but somehow, I miss you.

Haha. I can't even remember the last time I saw you. Was it 2023 or 2024? Funny how time flies, yet somehow, the thought of you still lingers in my mind.

And if there's one thing I wish I could change, it's how I handled things back then.

I regret a lot of things. I regret lying to you. I regret not being honest about how I truly felt. Most of all, I regret letting my fears get in the way of something that could've been beautiful.

I hope you're doing well. I genuinely hope you're happy, healing, and thriving in whatever chapter of life you're in right now.

You were, and still are, an amazing woman. You're beautiful, inside and out. You have so many stories to tell, and honestly, you're a beautiful story yourself.

I miss you.

I miss talking to you. I miss having coffee with you. I miss listening to your endless chikas and rants. Kahit na minsan, we only found our way back to each other kapag wala na tayong ibang makausap. Haha. Those little moments meant more to me than I ever admitted.

And you know what's funny?

Looking back, I realized na all along, ikaw pala talaga yung gusto ko.

I was just scared.

Scared of you, not because there was anything wrong with you, but because of everything you had to offer. You had so much love, potential, and so many beautiful things ahead of you. And there I was, constantly questioning myself.

*What if I'm not enough? What if I can't give her what she deserves? What if I end up disappointing her?*

Of course, I knew I had the potential to grow and become someone better. I knew I would eventually find my way and thrive. But at that time, I was terrified of messing things up.

I was scared that if you gave me a chance, I'd somehow ruin it. Or worse, that one day, you'd regret choosing me.

And maybe that's where I went wrong.

I was so afraid of losing something beautiful that I never even gave myself the chance to have it.

The truth is, **I always wanted it to be you.**

Ivan and Davon knew that. Maybe they understood it long before I had the courage to admit it to myself.

But I guess things worked out the way they were supposed to, right?

Maybe some people come into our lives not necessarily to stay, but to teach us something about ourselves. And you taught me that sometimes, the things we regret most aren't the things we did, but the things we were too afraid to do.

I don't know what life has in store for either of us. And I'm not writing this expecting anything in return. I guess I just wanted to finally say the things I should've said when I still had the chance.

If our paths ever cross again, I hope we'll both be in a better place. Happier, wiser, and a little less afraid of the things that once scared us.

And if they don't, that's okay too.

I'll always be grateful that, at some point in my life, I got to know someone like you.

Good luck with your future endeavors. I'll always be quietly rooting for you, wherever life takes you.

Maybe someday, somewhere, our paths will cross again.

Until then, take care of yourself.

**I miss you. And maybe a part of me always will.**

You deserve someone who is intentional about keeping you in their life, not someone who only reaches for you when it’s convenient.

Someone who makes an effort without being reminded, shows up without being chased, and values your presence beyond the moments they need your attention.

You shouldn’t have to decode mixed signals, survive on occasional affection, or constantly wonder where you stand. You deserve clarity, consistency, and a connection where the effort goes both ways.

Because someone can enjoy your presence without being willing to give you the place you deserve in their life. And someone can care about you without being capable of offering the kind of connection you need.

Stop holding on to someone’s potential while ignoring the reality of what they’re giving you.

You don’t have to assume the worst about someone to recognize that what they offer isn’t enough for you.

Let their actions speak. Let their effort reveal what their words cannot.

You deserve to be more than someone’s convenience. You deserve a connection that doesn’t require you to abandon your peace just to keep it.

Dear arbin,

Finally after a week, we are on call. All these days you have no idea how much I missed being with you.

I had so Many things going on in my mind that were literally the most unwanted. I missed talking to you.

Even when i was with my cousins, they would talk to their man and I was wishing u were there with me too. I understand. I hope you had fun. I'm happy for you.

I got so excited yesterday when I got a chance to see you and wave at you. It was something i always dreamt about. 🥹🤍

Rn it's 9:57pm. Monday night.

We are on call. You are sleeping and I am writing this to you. It feels like you are near me and I am maintaining silence making sure I won't wake you up.

My sanu my babydoll.

Thankyou.

Hey, Stranger.

I don’t think you’ll ever know how much I prayed for you to come back. I cried, I begged, and eventually tried to accept that you wouldn’t. Then I reached out, expecting nothing. But you replied. You wanted to reconnect, and God, I was happy you did.

But fuck, here I am again.

Waiting for your replies, checking if you’ve read my messages, wondering if I said something wrong. I’m back to being the one who’s too affected, too needy, too attached. And the worst part is, I can’t even be mad at you for not feeling the same way.
I wanted this. I fucking prayed for this.

And now I’m questioning everything again. Whether I actually like you, whether any of this means something to you, or if I’m just holding on to something that was never really there.

I wish I could cut you off. I wish I could be indifferent. But I know that if you messaged me again, I’d probably smile at my phone like nothing ever happened.

I spent so long asking God for one more chance with you. I didn’t think I’d have to ask Him to help me survive getting exactly what I wanted.

Z

(Hindi ka TOTGA)

L, wala akong relapse level na post about you today, busy ako, ang dami kong trainees this week, yes, full house the whole week, grateful ako sa work ko that keeps me busy and occupied, chinecheck ko pa din yung phone ko tuwing umaga, parang naging muscle memory na yung pagcheck ng "goodmorning babe" na chat mo. Walang ganong withdrawal today, tho naaalala kita pag nasa office ako, pero hindi sya mabigat today, hindi ko kelangang humagulgol sa CR, hindi ko kelangang magalit. Masaya ang lunes ko, sana palaging ganito. Para akong bumalik sa sarili ko, pagod ako buong araw pero masaya ako. Sana productive ka din everyday.

G, I've been contemplating if I should tell you how much I like you, but I went back to read some convo from our 4 yr old GC and decided that this friendship is more valuable than what I feel. I don't want to lose you and if holding back what I am feeling means I'll get to keep you forever, then I'll be alright.

Stephen Speaks' Passenger Seat will always remind me of you.

Hi. I just wanted to say that im sorry for everything. Im sorry if im failing to fix myself. You dont deserve to be with me. Youre better off without me. Hope you find your hapiness without me. If anything happens, pleaae dont look for me. I love you. Bye.

I’m sorry for being too controlling and impatient. I’m sorry for putting too much pressure and being too dependent on you. I always gave you tasks when I can’t handle them by myself, not considering your feelings and if you’re also tired.

All this time I’ve blamed you for the bulk of faults in our relationship but it just occured to me now that I also have my fair share of faults of why our relationship ended. It really hurt when it occured to me. You must have been tired and fed up with my attitude that’s why you agreed to breakup and be with another girl. It hurts. I don’t love you anymore but it just hurts that I’m also to blame for our failed relationship. It hurts that my attitude pushed you away.

Now that I’ve internalized this, I’ll make sure to be a better person and change my attitude so that my next relationship wouldn’t experience the toxicity that you’ve experienced. I aim to be less controlling and more patient. I’ll be more kind. I’ll love without any expectations. I’ll be a secured person that I won’t be dependent on another person again. In my next relationship, I wanna be in a healthy relationship where I just love the person that’s why I chose to be with him, not because I need another person to hold on and depend on.

I know I already said sorry to you a long time ago but I really haven’t internalized everything until now. I’m doing this for my healing.

We met for the first time in BGC a few years ago. It was my first "date" and honestly? Until now, it's still the most unforgettable and genuine conversation I have ever had.

We talked in that coffee shop like for hoursss and that was the time I realized na totoo pala yung mga nasa movies and stories na you feel like the whole world didn't exist and only the two of you existed while talking. I thought all that only happens in movies. But it happened to me that night. We were so deep into the conversation that we didn't even realize the coffee shop was already closing and most of the other customers already left. Still we walked around and we didn't want the night to end.

After that meeting, despite being busy at our own jobs and working in different cities, we still made time to meet around 3-4 times a week. I genuinely enjoyed your company. Eventually, I realized we wanted different lives and different ways of handling money. It was still in the early stages but I know those are very important things for a long-term relationship. Despite that, I chose to keep seeing you until you eventually asked if we could be more than just friends. I wanted to say yes, because the connection I felt with you was real. I said I need to think about it for a while. Eventually, I found out you blocked me on a social media app out of nowhere. But we still had the usual contact on another app. I decided to bring it up to you, and you couldn't give me a good reason for blocking me. Why would you ask me to be your girlfriend and yet block me on a certain app. It was fishy and I couldn't shake it off. So I eventually broke contact with you.

Then after about 2 years, you somehow got to contact me again with a "hey". It has zero context so I just replied in a cold way. You must've noticed. You apologized and said you just messaged me because you saw me in your dream. I was flattered but at the time, I just wished you well in life, and that is the last time we ever talked.

But every now and again, I still think of you, I still wonder if I made the right decision. What if I tried to understand better? Would I have gotten a reasonable explanation for you blocking me that time? Would we have ever worked out? Cause even after these few years, I still have never found anything close to the connection and the dedication you gave me. All the times you'd visit me despite being tired, or even when it's raining.

If you ever come across this, I hope you are well. Know that I appreciated all your efforts very much. I still don't know if I made the right call, but I hope maybe we get to start over someday, with no secrets.

I still think about you, sometimes.

I hope that despite your lies and betrayals, the constant fixation of wanting him over me, the painting of me as a monster, I hope that you still think of everything I have done.

Because after everything, kahit malungkot ako, I know I have done good. I have loved deep. And I cared so much.

I hope my kindness haunts you. In a way you will never find someplace else.

Dearest John, if you’re seeing this, please scroll away.
—

And when you needed something to let go of,
I was the first on your list.
Maybe because I was never really held,
and you just needed to officially put an end to things
so I would understand and leave.
But trust me, I knew, even when no words were spoken.
I had known long before.
I just kept my eyes shut,
hoping to keep you a little longer than I should have.
I’m too smart not to know,
but too foolish to let go.
To me, it was never really about the body heat
or the way you chased your breath.
It wasn’t about how much money you could put in your account,
and it certainly wasn’t about filling a certain void in me.
It wasn’t about running my fingers through your eyebrows,
down your nose, and to your lips,
nor was it about the lingering scent of your perfume
on my pillow after you finally left.
It was about you sharing your burdens with me.
It was about you showing me your vulnerability
and your uneasiness about the future.
It was about your strength in pushing through each day.
And it was about me finding myself in church,
praying to God to let me be the one
who could somehow ease your weary heart.

—
No hard feelings, future pañero! Okay lang if I don’t get the role I prayed for basta you’re included in the list this Jan 2027, that’s all that matters! I’ll catch up and be a lawyer too. Jan 2028. 🤞 ingat ka always, don’t beat your lungs. If one day everybody else, including yourself, won’t believe in you, hiramin mo yung akin. I’ve never doubted, since day one. I’ll miss you and I’ll always, always, ALWAYS be proud of you.

Dear D,

I was fine with being alone before you came into my life. Sanay na akong mag-isa, sanay na akong walang kasama, and I had learned how to be okay kahit walang taong nandiyan para sa'kin. Then you came along, being alone didn't feel so lonely anymore.

You noticed me. You made me feel loved in ways I didn't even know I needed. For a long time, you made me feel na maybe I didn't have to face everything on my own, na maybe there's someone out there who could choose me and stay. You made me feel safe enough to open my heart again, and I think that's what hurts the most now.

Kasi bakit mo pa pinaramdam na mahal mo ako kung iiwan mo rin pala ako sa huli?

Dapat galit ako sa'yo, dapat kaya kitang sisihin for all the pain I'm feeling right now. But I can't. Kahit nasasaktan ako, I still care about you. I still want you to be happy, even if that happiness no longer includes me.

Pero kung magiging totoo ako, ayokong malaman kung sino ang magiging person mo after me. Ayokong isipin na one day, may ibang taong makakatanggap ng patience, understanding, at pagmamahal na minsan mong binigay sa'kin. I know I have no right to ask you not to love someone else, pero sana maintindihan mo na hindi pa handa ang puso ko na isipin na may ibang taong papalit sa lugar ko.

Ang bigat bigat ng puso ko lately, D. I cry for you almost every night, and every morning, I have to remind myself na wala na tayo sa dati.

And sometimes, I wonder if I'll ever find someone like you again. Someone as patient as you, someone who tries to understand me kahit hindi ako madaling intindihin, someone who makes me feel na hindi ko kailangang maging perfect para lang mahalin. Natatakot ako na baka sa susunod na magmahal ako, hahanapin ko pa rin sa ibang tao yung mga bagay na minahal ko sa'yo. What if I meet someone good, pero deep inside, may parte pa rin sa'kin na ikaw ang hinahanap?

Alam kong hindi kita pwedeng piliting manatili kung ayaw mo na. I know that loving someone doesn't always mean you get to keep them. Pero sana, things had turned out differently. Sana hindi mo na lang pinaramdam na may taong kayang magmahal at pumili sa'kin nang ganito kung hindi rin pala tayo hanggang dulo.

But then again, I don't regret meeting you. I don't regret loving you. Kung may isang bagay lang akong hihilingin, sana hindi ganito kasakit ang kapalit ng pagmamahal ko sa'yo.

I don't know how long it will take before I feel okay again. Hindi ko alam kung kailan ako titigil na hanapin ka sa maliliit na bagay, kung kailan ko matatanggap na hindi na ikaw yung taong makakasama ko, o kung kailan ko maiisip ang pangalan mo ng hindi na kikirot ang puso ko.

Maybe one day, I'll be okay. Maybe one day, I'll genuinely be happy for you without secretly wishing na sana ako pa rin, na sana ako na lang ulit. Maybe one day, hindi na ako masasaktan kapag naaalala ko kung paano mo ako minahal.

Pero sa ngayon, I'm still here, missing you, trying to accept an ending na hindi ko naman ginusto.

I hope life treats you well. I hope you find happiness, peace, and someone who will love you the way you deserve. I hope someone gives you the same patience and understanding you once gave me.

I just wish I could be happy knowing that someone else will get to love you without feeling this pain in my chest.

Mahal kita, D. And maybe that's the saddest part of all this. Kahit nasasaktan ako, kahit kailangan na kitang bitawan, kahit alam kong hindi na kita pwedeng pilitin na piliin ako, there's still a part of me that wishes things could have been different.

Ang tanga tanga ko, nandiyan ka na pero bakit hinayaan pa kitang lumayo?

Take care of yourself, D. Thank you for making me feel loved, even if I now have to learn how to live with the fact that I can't be the one you love anymore.

Hanggang sa huli,

C.

nakakainis. nakakainis ka, self.

apaka overthinker mo. hindi lahat tungkol sa'yo, okay?

wa'g kang OA. nagdadrama ka na naman. no one owes you anything. not their time. not their effort.

ano naman kung di ka na niya pinapansin o nirereplyan? mamamatay ka ba? buhay ka pa rin naman hanggang ngayon. you'll be fine.

kasalan mo rin naman yan. sinabihan mo kasi siyang umiwas sa mga taong nakakasama sa mental health niya. HAHAHAHAHAHAHA. kasali ka don, ulol.

charot. not everything is about you, okay?

sige na. go rewatch your fave Ghibli film na. 'wag nang sad.

Dear El,

Happy 24th birthday, my luv.

It's another year and another reason for me to be thankful that you exist in this world. I hope you continue to be the same kind, caring, and loving person you were on the day I met you.

So, how are your adventures going? I hope you've crossed a couple of items off your list. I wonder, how's work going? I hope you're no longer as stressed and exhausted as you were the last time we talked. How about your studies? I hope you're still getting enough sleep and rest. Your daily commute is no joke, after all.

I wonder what you've wished for this year. But knowing you, it's probably either peace of mind or more opportunities.

You know, I have so many stories to tell you na. Natuto ka na bang mag-drive? Kasi ako, kakakuha ko lang ng driving school certificate ko kanina... and not to mention, I've already driven to Santo Tomas. Sooo... did I win our bet? If I did, pwede bang ang reward ko na lang is to have my friend back?

Anyway, kamusta naman sina Taffy, Russel, Maddy, and Baniway? Siguro ang lalaki na nila. Kilala pa kaya ako ni Taffy? Ikaw kasi, kilala ka pa ni Amber.

Speaking of her, she's as sweet as ever, but she's doubled in size now. Alam mo, sometimes I feel like sa'yo siya nagmana ng sweetness niya. Ang galing na rin niyang umakyat sa upuan ko at sumilip sa bintana kapag lumalabas ako ng kwarto, eh. I think if you saw her again, she'd melt your heart.

Me? I'm doing a lot better na. Seeking professional help really does wonders, but unfortunately, the process isn't as simple as flipping a switch. Still, I've been doing a lot better since then. Did you know that I'm finally able to look toward the future with optimism again? Well, work and other problems still exist naman, pero I've been handling them much better.

Hmm... siguro ang point ko lang when it comes to me is that you no longer have to worry about me. I can handle things on my own now.

Ayun na lang muna for this year's birthday greeting ko sa'yo. Again, happy birthday, Elly! I miss you so much, and I wish you were still mine. But I'm happy for you because I know in my heart that you're in a much better place now, even without me.

Once Yours,
C13

I just want you to know that yeah I know the truth, so you don’t have to worry about that anymore.

Anyway, congratulations on all your hard work. Finally, in God’s perfect timing, all your efforts have paid off. I know how much work you’ve put into this, and I’m genuinely happy for you. I’m proud of you, and I hope you get to enjoy and appreciate this moment because you deserve it.

As for us, even though we only had a short time together, I won’t pretend that what happened didn’t hurt me. It did, deeply. I didn’t expect to get this attached, but I did. 

Maybe that’s what hurts the most. It wasn’t just about liking you, it was about believing that we were building something genuine, only to find out there were things I didn’t know about you. I understand that things don’t always work out, but it’s difficult when the person you’ve started trusting turns out to be different from the person you thought you knew.

Still, I don’t regret getting to know you, and I don’t want what happened to erase the good moments we shared. Whatever your feelings were, mine were genuine, and I know that I cared about you sincerely.

I just wanted to congratulate you and say goodbye properly. Despite everything, I genuinely wish you well, not just with this achievement but with everything that comes next in your life.

Take care always, bb. And congratulations again. 🤍