20+ years in the Marines and still serving. Unit PT gives you structure. Training on your own time is harder.

On my own time, I either did too much or nothing. So I built a simple plan.

• 4 days a week. Upper body, lower body, upper, lower.
• 4 exercises a day. 4 sets each.
• 20 seconds on, 10 seconds off at first.
• 2 minutes rest between exercises.
• About 21 minutes with warm-up and cool-down.

Every few weeks I add time: 30 on, 15 off, then 40 on, 20 off.

It works with dumbbells or just your body weight. No gym needed.

The structure is the point. Same days, same plan. You just show up.

How are other vets staying consistent on their own?

I was sleeping 3-5hrs a night for the last 20 years while in the navy / in navy training programs (got credit for 12 years AD though was in navy training for 8 years prior). I've been out 3 months and now I'm sleeping like 10hrs+ a night. Has this happened to anyone else? I was taking a break before working again; maybe I just need to get a job lol.

ETA: also having lots of vivid dreams about joining again, then waking up kind of sad that the door is closed now (I doubt I'd pass MEPS again to rejoin at my age/w my issues). It's weird bc all I wanted the last few years was to get out. But I also am thinking/hoping my body is recovering in the most necessary way rn, which is literally why I was taking time off before working again.

Title: Veterans, how would you feel about a college professor constantly portraying military life negatively?
I’m currently working on my bachelor’s degree in social work, and something has been bothering me throughout the semester. I wanted to get opinions from other veterans because I’m starting to wonder if I’m taking this too personally.
For some background, I grew up as a military brat, served in the military myself, and previously worked as a mental health tech at a psychiatric hospital that had a military unit. I worked directly with service members and helped facilitate groups. I loved working with that population. My professor also worked at the same hospital, but as a therapist.
Throughout the semester, whenever he brings up the military, it’s almost always negative. Recently, he described the military as a bureaucratic nightmare, talked about service members essentially selling their souls to the government, and how they no longer have control over their own lives.
One example that really bothered me was his discussion about taking leave. He talked about how complicated the process is, all the steps involved, and how someone could have a dying parent and still be told they couldn’t go home. The way he described it made it sound like the military has absolutely no compassion for its members.
I understand there are procedures and that emergency leave isn’t automatically guaranteed, but in my experience, I’ve never personally known someone who couldn’t get home during a family emergency, even while deployed. I’m sure others have experienced differently, but I also know there are processes in place for these situations. The military is made up of people too, including leadership who have families and understand what it’s like to lose someone.
He also mentioned in a previous lecture that some social workers consider working for the VA an easy route or selling out because veterans already have so many resources available.
What bothers me is that so much of his perspective seems to come from working with military members receiving psychiatric treatment. I’ve worked with that same population, and while many genuinely struggled with trauma and mental health issues, others were unhappy with military life and looking for ways out. Sometimes those things overlapped. I just don’t think those experiences should be used to represent everyone who serves.
I’m not saying the military is perfect. I served, and I know firsthand that it isn’t. There are terrible leaders, unnecessary procedures, and situations that could have been handled much better. But there are also good leaders, opportunities, friendships, and experiences that can positively change someone’s life.
I’m sitting in college today using benefits I earned through my service. The military played a big part in getting me where I am, and despite the negative experiences I’ve had, I can still recognize the good that came from it.
I think what frustrates me most is that he doesn’t really invite discussion or acknowledge that experiences vary. He gives his examples as part of the lecture and moves on. Meanwhile, I’m sitting there wanting to challenge some of what he’s saying but also not wanting to create tension or have it affect how I’m viewed as a student.
It’s honestly gotten to the point where I’m starting to disengage whenever he brings up the military, and I hate that because I genuinely enjoy what I’m studying.
I’m not looking for everyone to defend the military. I know plenty of veterans have had awful experiences, and I respect that. I just feel like there’s a difference between acknowledging the military’s problems and repeatedly portraying the entire institution as terrible.
For those of you who served, what do you think? Am I letting my personal connection to the military influence how I’m interpreting his comments? Have you encountered similar attitudes in college or civilian workplaces?
Would you say something, or would you just let it go and finish the class?

I was in Bagram/Kandahar around 2009. Supply was always providing us with rip it energy drinks, and this honeybun. This was the best honeybuns I’ve ever had. It was not a nationwide brand. They were definitely regional. Does anyone remember the company name? Or what area they were made in? I feel like it was Pennsylvania or a neighbouring state, but I could be wrong.

It is.......without fail.......the most annoying and psychologically validation craving bunch of us. The loudest. The ones that want everyone to know what they did. It check marks an instant "avoid in public" any time I see them.

If you're one of those guys, tone it down like, 70 to 80 percent, for the rest of us with dignity.

I’m ex-British Army. I only served a few years, never saw combat or anything, and I left on a medical discharge due to my mental health at the time.

Since leaving the army I have faced a lot of struggle. I attempted to take my life, I have experienced homelessness, and it’s taken me 5 years to finally start receiving government support for my disability. In short, the military, and the wider government, have done nothing to support me since leaving.

Now don’t get me wrong- I’m no hero, and I don’t feel any more entitled to support than the bloke next to me. But I have started to become resentful towards the military over this, as I genuinely believe I’d have a normal life if I had not have served, and the lack of support has absolutely made me worse. I used to feel proud that I had signed up, but even this has gone.

I’m at a point where I’ve thought about chucking my beret in the bin, deleting the pictures, and trying to forget that part of my life. If I do get to a place where I can work again, I might even take the army off of my CV and pretend I did something else or was just unemployed.

I’ll be honest, I’m crying as I write this. I never thought I would become anything close to hateful towards the ‘establishment’, but here I am. Has anyone else ever felt like this? And how did you move forward? I’m 25 and I can’t let this dictate my life, I either need to move past the resentment and find pride again or I need to get rid of that part of my life.

And just to add- I am openly emotional about this, but I’m healthily emotional before anyone sends links for support lines or anything. I’m safe, I just need to talk to blokes that get it.

My name is Lucy Sellinger, Undergraduate Research Assistant in Dr. James Stone's Traumatic Brain Injury lab and a U.S. Navy Midshipman 3/C at the University of Virginia. Reach out to Abby Lyons at  [aal7fn@uvahealth.org](mailto:aal7fn@uvahealth.org) with questions!

Go to https://www.uvahealth.com/clinical-trials/trial/302633 for more!

I bought a TV for my bedroom and made a rolling stand. I had it set up at the end of my bed and enjoyed being able to watch stuff while laying down in my comfort zone. I then woke up to loud bang sound and noticed my TV was on the ground. I turned on the light and saw it had my foot print on it. Lesson learned. That's it. Anyone else have a similar situation?

How do I get special funeral services for him?

I bought a stand and Television over the weekend. Had it set up at the end of my bed. This morning I woke up to a loud bang and my tv was on the ground. I noticed my foot print on the side of it. Thats all. Anyone else have similar situations?

I had been enrolled in VA healthcare and recently had a change and was sent a letter i am enrolled in priority group 1. All my doctors including specialists are outside the VA. without wanting to get into details i will loose my insurance in the near future. We have been trying to figure out directions to go and thought i would see what advice others may have. i do not know how responsive or anything my area is and maybe i need to some how figure that out fist?

do I need to move all my care to the VA to take advantage of medications? looking online i do not think any of my doctors in the community thing. would i just need to see a primary care doctor and see if they would be willing to give me referrals to the specialists i currently have? would that suffice? Would they even do that?

I guess i am just looking to see what others may suggest to someone who is new to navigating this and whose brain isn't what it used to be. i love my primary care but it may be worth it to reduce our costs with my reduced income. i tried searching some but have problems grasping and trying to relate posts to myself.

thank you in advance for any suggestions and thoughts.

I used Vocational Rehab for a Master's program several years back but I am looking at shifting to a totally different field (From finance to Machine Learning) and heard a rumor that it's totally possible to have VR&E foot the bill a second time.

I still have my Post 9/11 so I can make the world go round either way but really want to know if this is worth the squeeze.

Hello everyone!

I am a civil air patrol cadet (under 18) who is looking for Veterans' opinions on Wreaths Across America and alternatives that my squadron could participate in next year. Even if it is not specifically already partnered with Civil Air Patrol like Wreaths Across America is, I would love to know what could be done to make a more positive and measurable impact on the lives of veterans who are still with us or the families of the ones who have already made the ultimate sacrifice.

Background info:

I was able to raise money for 100 wreaths - $1700, $500 of which goes to my squadron - but I realize that Wreaths Across America isn't a great organization overall and as much as I understand the importance of remembering fallen veterans and enjoy volunteering my time to these ceremonies, I would like to find and hopefully participate, either on my own or with my squadron, in alternatives.

Thank you so much for your time! I truly appreciate everything you guys do and I would love to know what I can do to help, in any way!

TLDR: Wreaths Across America alternatives for Civil Air Patrol Cadets/Squadrons

I'm hoping to hear from veterans (especially Marines) and their partners who have worked through something similar.

My partner is a veteran, and we have a genuinely beautiful relationship. He's deeply loving, devoted, thoughtful, and emotionally intelligent. There's so much tenderness and care between us, and I love him tremendously.

But occasionally, we trigger each other, and conflicts escalate in ways that really scare me. When he's upset, his response can become intense: raised voice, aggressive tone, and swearing, sometimes directed at me. Even when he doesn't intend to intimidate me, I find myself feeling frightened, shutting down, or struggling to stay present.

These moments feel so different from the man I know and love.

I recognize that we both bring our own histories and triggers into the relationship. I'm trying to understand how his military experience may have shaped his responses to conflict without attributing everything to it. I want to approach this with compassion while also recognizing that feeling safe during disagreements is essential.

I'd especially love to hear from couples who've made real progress:

• Veterans: Have you struggled with anger or intensity during conflict? What helped you recognize its impact on your partner and change those patterns?
• Spouses/partners: How did you navigate these moments without walking on eggshells or taking responsibility for managing your partner's emotions?
• Couples: What actually worked? Therapy, communication strategies, timeouts, recognizing triggers earlier? Did the yelling genuinely diminish over time, and what did accountability and repair look like?

I'm especially interested in specific experiences, practical strategies, and honest stories about what worked (or didn't).

I love my partner deeply and don't want to reduce him to his hardest moments or his military experience. But I also don't want to minimize my own fear.

How have you learned to balance compassion for trauma with accountability, emotional safety, and lasting change?

Thank you to anyone willing to share.

We know all about the famous social media accounts of people posting their routines about how it is important to wake up at 4 am every morning, do their workout, shave in the morning, make their bed, and how it is still an important part of your life.

But how many of you just...........straight up dont need any of that anymore? How many wake up at 937 am, fire up the smoker, let your white beard get a little bit longer, crack a morning breakfast stout, laugh at the thought of calling anybody sir or maam ever again?

I’m a semester away from graduating however it’s at a school with policies against lgbtq+ I was in the closet for years but through counseling outside of the VA was able to open up and come out to very few people. Anyways my current program will not lead to sustained employment due to policies against lgbtq in this type of environment. I’m worried I’ll also be expelled for violating the programs lgbtq policies. I’ve exhausted GI bill but have a retro that’s being processed and reviewed which would restore time back to GI bill. I know I’m close to the 48th month limit but has anyone ever come out to their VRE counselor and gotten approved for a program transfer?

For context:
I was born in Florida, moved to Colombia as a kid and joined the Colombian Marines (Infantry) when I became of age, once I finished my contract I came back to the United States and joined the US Marines (0311/0352). I was Admin Separated due to circumstances that were honestly unfair.

I’m still fighting to fix it, but a lot of my friends are telling me to give up and just live a civilian life. The problem is, I don’t want to. I can’t stand being a civilian, and there is nothing else out there I want to pursue. I want to keep going and keep fighting for it, but I feel like I’m just in my own head about it, and I want to know what other veterans might have to say about it.

I’m in the process of getting my VA rating, but in all truth, I would take the chance of getting back in right now over getting 100% p&t. That’s just where I am at the moment.
Any advice?

Man I've been medically retired for over a year now with no possibility of going back in. I did more then the average Joe but I still live with this feeling that I didn't do enough. It's like imposter syndrome without being a imposter. I sit nervously watching the news worried about people I would consider to be family, old co dies protecting his students from a mass shooter, next a friend dies in a black hawk crash, best friend shoots himself in the face at my house because he can't take it, wife leaves with the dog. I'm just waiting for the next thing to happen nervously. It's like i can't turn my brain off and stop worrying no matter how many pills I'm prescribed.

Last night my coworker slipped and fell. She was bleeding from her knee and was crying. For some reason, it just reminded me from a moment when I was Afghanistan and I was there for the aftermath of an engagement. I saw this woman covered in blood crying and screaming. It just stood out to me and I never wanted to see something like that ever again. I thought I’ve moved on from it but seeing my female coworker crying from a slight injury. It just triggered me, now I can’t unsee the woman face from afghan and it been bothering me at work. I don’t know. Maybe I’m too soft for this world.

Good morning,

Today, I start going through my late father’s military stuff he left behind. Im talking boxes of documents and random things.

For some background, he was a typical Army enlisted service member like myself. Nothing great or over the top. Did his duty, got out and started a family.

My question is…what do I do with all of this stuff? The paperwork? He’s been dead for 5 years, so no paperwork of his would benefit me. Outside of pictures, is there any reason I can’t burn all these documents one night instead of carrying them on? Pictures ok keeping for me. My kids can decide what to do with my junk. Thanks.

A lot of unexpected BS occurred leading up to and into this semester, and now I'm looking at an F, or a D at best in physics when I have never made anything less than an A in my sciences. Such a low grade in a foundational science course will be extremely damaging for entrance to any university.

I can't withdraw from the course because it will drop me below half-time enrollment for the entire semester and I'll incur an obscene debt, but riding out to the end ruins three years of labor and any chance of entering a competitive chemistry program. I also lack any mitigating circumstances to use the 6hr exception rule. Are there any other damage control options, conventional or otherwise, or am I just screwed no matter which way it goes?

How has your care been at VA hospitals? Medicare copays, deductibles and meds getting ridiculous.

Update: Thank you all for the replies. I think we will definitely look into this. It's goid to hear some positive replies.I am sorry for those who have had bad experiences. I really do appreciate everyone's input.