Hello r/enfj!

I've never had the occassion to come by much but I have recently started dating one of you so of course I will be lurking your sub from here on out (it is so quiet compared to the other subs fr!)

So anyways just wanted to say hi! Feel free to ask me stuff (about the relationship or otherwise) :D

I’m 34 and looking for a new career I can really commit to. I relate to both ENFP and ENFJ, and my Strong Interest Inventory results were highest in Artistic and Social, with Investigative and Enterprising almost tied.

My background is in hospitality, events, customer service and rental administration. I enjoy communicating, explaining things and working with people. Good income is my biggest priority, and I’m willing to retrain.

Career counselling has left me with an overwhelming list rather than a clear direction, so I’d love some real-world perspectives.

What career have you found both satisfying and financially worthwhile? What qualifications did you need, and what are the downsides? I know personality type can’t pick a career for me—I’m interested in hearing what has actually worked for you.

Can you tell if someone is secretly really smart?
If so, what are the signs?

Does anyone else that’s an ENJF like you don’t easily cut people out of your life but once you decide to close a door, do you guys like never want anything to do with those people ever again?

And another question does any other ENFJ have a hard time having super close friends in a friend group, like you can easily talk to everyone but it’s always surface level and you rarely ever end up connecting with people on a deeper level?

At the end of the day you just kind of are alone even tho you’re probably the most outgoing person out there

Is this the case for anyone else?

This person got offended that someone shared his bad experience about an enfj and that enfj can be highly narcissistic or have NPD.

She kept defending Enfjs, and I contradicted her agreeing with the other person. She kept repeating the same thing, so I told her she needs to self-reflect.

She then DM-d me, twisting my words saying I told her "she needs help" and that Im mean to her, when in fact I was just disagreeing. She called me a narcissist and blocked me and using words like DARVO implying I'm some sort of master manipulator.

Edit: censored it.

Well, it turned out that me being enfj is what caused my adhd, which is almost gone as long as or my needs are met. Help. Is that even possible?. Help. I feel others and it's too loud. Help

hello everyone, I've been doing some really interesting research over the past few years into all the different mbti types and blood type personalities which are very popular in China, South Korea and Japan. Just a quick summary for those who are not familiar with the blood type personalities concept it's essentially like mbti but it's based on the different blood groups and it's taken very seriously in parts of Asia.

The research I've been doing was primarily of surveying all the different mbti types and asking them what their blood group was and correlating it against their mbti. I found that there was a significant pattern taking place with the different types and they pretty much always had the same blood group for a particular type and then the minority would have an anomalous blood group that didn't fit that pattern trend. In this research I have noticed that the vast majority 98% of ENFJ-A's typically have O-Negative Blood, and 2% have anomalous blood groups that don't fit the pattern.

Another interesting mbti/blood type pattern I have found is that INFJ-A's usually 90% of them have A blood, 5% have O Blood and then the remaining 5% are anomalous blood groups that don't fit the pattern. ENFP's I've found to be overwhelming O Positive.

we both are made of stars. maybe from same star at some time. maybe from different star. millions or billions of years , may we were close. maybe few millimetre away. maybe we didn’t wanted to separate, but we exploded and separated . after all this time , i think we met again . it’s like maybe i craved for you , from billions of years . now that we were here , still some forces took u away. maybe for sometime of my and your life time . or maybe again , for billions of years. or maybe for eternity . i still have hope. we will meet again , maybe after death as one. or maybe again in some different form just like a star, or human , or a rock. we will touch again . we will maybe share those electrons again with the touch. maybe we will sense again each other , with the smell , the taste , the touch , the sight or the voice . maybe we will feel the presence of each other again. i do not know anything.
the “we time “ we had was little . i admired u. i do not know why. why it felt something. was it love , or just another reaction. but it felt like i needed you. i am not sad , not happy. i am just drifting deep into the oceans , deep into the dark space , hollow , nothingness , my consciousness is getting numb. i always felt it is my mistake . that maybe i couldn’t explain myself. i couldn’t free you , from this world, this society.
i may sound like a fiction , or insane or out of reality . but is that what life is ? the illusion , the mystery, the finite fiction.
i do not even know now, of anything if it matters. i am not depressed , just lonely , just like the god . just like this universe , just like a star,just like you . just like everyone else , being on illusions , romanticizing their life , their existence , with colours , colours of leaves .
what is eternity ? who am i ?who are you? what is this all? i do not know . the question is not about if i should come back to the fake world and start romanticizing again. the question is about “can i do it again?” do i want to ?

So yeah i made a new friend while i was studying but like we were just classmates ig

But now we are working together and spend the whole day together sit together, eat together etc.

And she is nice , maybe its not an isfj thing. But she's a hypocrite kindof. She complain about some of our coworkers but then is very helping and nice to them hugging them etc.

She's very clingy, she has jokingly ig told me many times to not make new friends she doesn't like it . And is always watching me like a hawk whenever i ak talking to someone else. But is very close to other coworkers.

And also her treating me like shes my mother? Like someone going for something and she be like " my name you should go with her." Its not like i wasn't??

She is very sensitive, she once told me she cried beacuse i raised my voice a bit when she was asking me something. I can never answer with one word or a normal neutral response she will continue asking me why i said it like this? .

Shes judgemental, she is smart and we know you are smart, so when she asks for an opinion and someone gives it to her she will act all nice like yeahh ur right and then judge them for being dumb?

I can never ask her something she's very condescending when i ask her something about work related. She will continue to ignore what i say but is very sensitive if i ignore her. She will say i don't want to eat out or anything sweet since she's dieting than be moody when i don't give her the chocolate i bought.

And the thing that is annoying the hell out of me is this favor thing.

Like i will ask her if she wants some takeout and she will agree then when we're done eating she ll be like i only ate for you i wasn't in the mood to eat?? She has done this manyyyy times. For different things i have stopped asking her things and stopped giving my opinion.

So i am burned out rn . She has taken so much energy from me i feel like i can't even communicate with other ppl anymore.

Fellow ENFJ here 28, M from the UK, nice to meet you all! 😊

Same

Hi there ENFJs i am here to tell you. You guys need to work on your people pleasing habits. Like wth guys , you like being a doormat or what. Become more evil. What are you guys even doing with your life. Cause I know you all are acting and are evil inside. Jk btw. Peace

If you know you know 😂

- ENFJ MBTI memes

My BFF in highschool was an ENFJ (F/F). We had a blast and were VERY close. That said, we grew apart in life due to very different pathways after college (kids vs. no kids was the biggest difference). I felt like there was also this underlying expectation that she really expected to "heal" me. I do have a lot of trauma, and as she stepped into her career in personal coaching, I became a project she couldn't master.

Here's why I'm sharing. I am poly and have fallen hard for an amazing ENFJ man. I feel so many of the same patterns between us, and I just want to understand from lived experience what the real challenges are in a romantic relationship I need to be aware of.

Like, I know to my core HOW MUCH ENFJ REALLY DO ACTIVILY CARE for people they love. I'm already benefiting from it. I know this man feels my level of love and commitment to him too, BUT I am afraid of this previous pitfall, specifically of him giving and loving me so much that I end up letting him down somehow, or don't really know how to be there for him when it really matters. Honestly, it has always been hard to know when an ENFJ I know (even casually at work) need support because you all tend to naturally have your life in order 95% of the time.

I think most of my previous issues with the BFF were immaturity on both sides and me being overwhelmed with her expectations so I just ended up letting her go.

Obviously, I don't want this outcome again. I am not the same person. I've healed a lot! He's pretty balanced, and luckily with this pairing, communication will never be an issue, which is one of the reasons I am falling at hard. Talking and expecting honesty at all times seems to be an ENFJ universal love language best I can tell! It's so refreshing!

TLDR Ask:

- I'm looking for any stories/pointers from you ENFJ on how your beloved ENTP meets your needs?

- What have been the biggest challenges?

- I know how magical our minds and different ways of seeing the world is, and now that I'm "all grown up" and mostly healed, I want to learn, emulate, and become the type of partner that an ENFJ needs for the long haul!

TYIA!

Like the title. I had a crazy Thanksgiving last year that was Bravo worthy. Last year my youngest sister name K invited one of our other sisters V to Thanksgiving at T, another sister that all of us shares. V and T lets say have beef with each other. I asked K why she did that and she "assumed" its been a long time they should put their differences and so I had to break the new that V was coming over to T. So T thought I invited V over. Lets say it went downhill so quick...V said something that made T upset. Tears were made...there was yelling and some how I got kicked out because I didnt wanna choose sides. There is more to the story but I will keep the boring details to myself.

This year my mom's hosting Thanksgiving and nobody wanted to invite T to it because she can be very problematic. But K told T and her Husband about Thanksgiving and nobody has the heart to disinvite them. I hate the K assumes things and open up. She claims that T is mature and will hold every topic in her head but idk. My brother, my mom's boyfriend, my sister V and I just dont wanna let her in talking about personal matter because she will turn everyone on each other like always and say "Im only saying these things because I wanna help..." or "because I love you". When nobody wants to really hear it.

Idk why is it hard for K to read the room...she's a scorpio which is a water sign and I thought they were intuitive. I say Im glad I can read the room. I hope Thanksgiving doesnt become a disaster.

So I have a trip for Halloween weekend. It was supposed to be with somebody but due to some circumstances, they are not coming.
And I cannot get a refund on the Airbnb I booked, so it’s just me.
But other than that. I’m curious about my fellow ENFJ’s
For me, I like being around people and I like talking to people and I like making connections! I believe you guys will be the same

But this is a solo trip far from the city. And my question is have you guys ever done something like this before and if you did, how was it?

Heh, did he mean us and the ENTJ as our counterparts on the NT side of things?

I’m not an ENFJ, but I think ENTJ-INFP seems like it’d be interesting in the sense that I’m curious about how this dynamic would play out (ENTJ-ENFP too.) I feel like in these pairings both would have a lot to offer one another, and since enfp’s have stronger Te I could see them “getting” ENTJ’s more. I think the average ENFP and entj would get along better than the average ENFP and ESTJ (though I think Maria Von Trapp and Captain Von Trapp from the sound of music are an example of an ESTJ-ENFP pairing.) I think Sarah and Jareth (though Jareth was too old for her) from “labyrinth” (1986) were INFP and entj respectively.

I also think ENFJ-INTP seems like it has the potential to be interesting.

I’m also curious about INTJ-ISFP.

Like everyone's be saying that they met ENFJ, but how do you understand that they are that?