I did my last dbt session two years ago and I’m still recovering from being trained to not question when I’m being taken advantage of and not trusting my instincts.

this therapist was not even fully trained when they were assigned to me. They knew I was being abused but chose to ignore it and focus on my reaction rather than what I was going through. They used a “skill” when I wasn’t even suicidal called “withdrawal of warmth” just because I challenged their suggestion due to health issues I was going through at the time. They shouted at me saying I was trying hard enough, accused me of not doing the work then coached me to self soothe because I was obviously triggered by their change of tone and accusations towards me out of nowhere. I fell into a fawn response and feels like I’ve been in one since

Since this therapist, I’ve found myself in multiple situations where I have been taken advantage of and further traumatised. I used to be confrontational and outspoken as a way to protect myself after a lifetime of having no one to protect me, but now i question and subconsciously blame myself first when anything happens to me. I feel like I have no say in anything and reverted back to the shy quiet child I used to be and it’s left me vulnerable and without a voice.

Idk why or how this has effected me this much to the point that even years later I’m still struggling, but it has and im terrified to even attempt to have a life anymore because I feel like ive Been conditioned (again) to accept abuse and ive forgotten how to break out of it

I had an acquaintance once who was studying to become a psychologist. She came from a normal immigrant working class background, but she said almost all of her classmates were super white, upper middle class girls. She said they never have to work a side job since high school and have very good financial cushioning from their parents, this is how they afford to study a 5 year degree. Them not needing to work, struggle or have any trauma allows them to focus on studies and memorising well...She said they are too privileged to even understand how it's like to work at a restaurant on the side...

Recently I met a guy who's family is upper middle class. His sister was studying 2nd year psychology and the parents decided to gift her a brand new car fully paid for to reward her for her hardwork...and also recently they bought her an apartment... (where is my reward for all the struggles in my life? where are my free cars and apartments?)

Yeah so how can I trust these people who got all the privileges in life, spent their early 20s studying, never had a 'average people job', to get freebies from their parents, to understand average people struggles just because they have memorised some books for 5 damn years? These are the same people who get upset cos I am stressed about paying rent and inflation and I'm not 'chasing my dreams' and I told them life ain't fair and most people don't do whatever we want!

After experiencing therapy abuse, it’s very difficult to go back to therapy and try with another therapist. If you had significant trauma from your past before you saw your therapist (such as childhood trauma or otherwise), did you find a way to heal from that? And if so, what helped you heal? Society just pushes therapy as the only way to heal from past trauma, and I don’t believe it’s the only thing that helps.

I've been depressed and suicidal most of my life. I started antidepressants and therapy about ten years ago when I was pregnant with my first child. It really worked back then.

Over the years tho. Things started to get worse in my head. Meds were changed. The therapists got changed a lot. I got busy with more kids.

I have a family of six now. Two adults, and four kids. The problem is that both my partner and the four kids are on the spectrum. So, it's a lot to handle.

I struggled a lot. Quite naturally as a depressed person I put my energy into taking care of the kids and neglected myself.

Then two years ago my mother suddenly died. Cancer. Caught too late. Nothing to be done. She was gone in six months. I dropped the ball completely at that point. I took care of the kids with bare minimum, but that's still a lot because they're special needs, and my husband, as much as I love him, he can't deal with all the organising because of his own quirks.

We worked it out tho somehow. Life isn't perfect. The kids deserve so much better than what I can give. I have horrible guilt over how bad of a mother I am.

Well. It's been two years now, and I finally got the spark to do something about myself. I went to a doctor's appointment to ask for help for myself. I got bloodwork finally done and my regular meds updated and all that important shit. But of course the doctor realised I'm depressed. I had to admit that I've lost contact to therapy and my meds don't seem to help anymore. She said I should renew contact before I can be helped further, and she also upped the dose of my current meds.

I don't know what happened, but I seriously spiralled down from that. I got more and more anxious and suicidal, and I ran out of my anxiety meds. And the doctor's refused to renew the prescription without a contact to therapy. So I went.

And the doctor there was lovely, I have to admit that. She was. We talked, she listened. She understood what I was saying. We ended up switching my medication, and for now that seems like a good solution. But on top of just meds I was supposed to go to therapy and that's where my grief starts.

You see, I was feeling quite positive. I thought I did a good thing for reaching out finally. I thought I'm responsible. I thought I would get help for ME.

But as I talked to the therapist, I said I'm seriously suicidal, and that the situation at home is very stressful because I'm responsible for almost all of the metawork at home. And she got worried about MY FAMILY. Not me. The family.

And because she got worried she is by law mandated to report child protective services.

But that is not why I came there. I've had help from social services throughout the years. I know they can't provide the kind of help that would help us.

I went because I wanted someone to help me understand that these awful thoughts I have. Someone to listen. To show compassion. To understand. Maybe offer explanation. I don't know.

But instead I got more work to do. Now I need to somehow deal with cps on top of everything else. I left therapy crying and wanting to kill myself worse than before. I regret so much that I opened up. I should have shut up. I never should have gone there. For a long moment I wished I had killed myself instead of reached out.

I feel like I vanished as a person. I wasn't just suffering woman who needs help. I was a mother of four who can't provide enough for her kids. And I keep wondering, had I been a man, would they had seen me differently? I don't know. I guess it doesn't matter.

I'm seriously considering lying from now on. I'll tell the social workers I'm just fine. Go away. I don't need help.

And maybe in fifteen years when the kids are old enough I can try going back.

So I have been a very depressed and anxious person most of my life and got diagnosed with depression and anxiety at age 13 so almost 20 years ago. I have been on more mental health medications that I can even name or remember and have had probably 20 therapists over my life time. I don’t understand why therapists try to do a safety plan with people because I feel like if people really wanted to commit they would do it. I have had SI in the past , especially after my daughter died which also caused my PTSD, but I am not currently . However this is very controversial but idk why people try to do S prevention . Like I understand if someone is having bad mental issues that isn’t like them and that means something out of the ordinary, but why should someone who deals with a lifelong mental illness be forced to live .. people don’t understand how terrible life can really be not even mentally but environmentally as well and that a lot of issues such as financial insecurity, poverty, SA, lifelong abuse contributes to SI. Unless you’re going to pay this person bills and help them stop from getting evicted you shouldn’t really act holier than thou when that person is fucking tired.
This is also another part of the reason why I hate CBT therapy because it’s essentially saying that what you’re going through isn’t that bad, you just have wrong thinking about it . Like okay what’s a positive way I could have thought about my daughter dying suddenly please enlighten me . 😂

I’m unlearning some twisted truths I learned in therapy.

Just because someone meets the criteria for anxiety or depression or another mental health disorder doesn’t mean they need to take on that label for themselves. If more than 50 percent of people are estimated to have such mental health disorders, the problems are structural, not individual.

Being taught by society to be super independent but super dependent on someone in a clinical way is weird and it makes sense that it doesn’t feel quite right with all the professional boundaries in play

Any general claim isn’t an over generalization. Any concern about bothering others isn’t me over performing. Any confidence in myself isn’t arrogance. Any ability to identify risks to do mitigations isn’t anxiety. Any fear isn’t anxiety.

These ways of thinking have been used in spiritual or religious systems in the past to get people to internalize systemic problems and to take responsibility for smoothing things over.

The therapists exhaustion often makes them come up with interesting stories, like the trauma one is in style. Everyone has trauma, our brain is broken as if we didn’t evolve in the jungle dying at 30 and we are broken by pictures on our cell phone of people more attractive than us. It’s a little absurd

It’s a science in its infancy, runs on trends, and is believed in like a religion by many people. Most of the research is done on undergrads, and the studies they cite don’t really prove the things they say, involve many assumptions, and just has faulty science. Any physical treatment they acknowledge it doesn’t always work, but therapy everyone thinks it will always work and confront your vices and do better.

I’m sane. My logic is straight. It makes sense to be down sometimes about real problems in my life.

Therapists don’t want to cause us harm. The profession attracts people who want to help and understand the world and the mind. They have invested often ten years or more of their life, many thousands of dollars, and their career into this methodology which arguably works for some (although do they just say that on the survey and tough it out, we will never know). They have so much of a sunk cost fallacy, they are like a nun who is 90 years old. They have invested so much they can’t bear to look at the possibility that what they believe is not true. However the therapists have just as many interpersonal problems as the rest and unlike doctors tend to be blind to their own infirmity.

One thing I noticed is therapist’s do not take rejection well. Although they think that they can act and treat you however they want and please. The standard does not apply to them. It’s a double standard. A therapist cannot handle rejection in any way, shape or form that I’ve came across. Maybe if the therapist was confident in themselves and their skills per say of their profession they would be able to handle something like this. I think maybe a good therapist, if there is any would not be insecure.

If you reject a therapist for their profession or their advice/treatment they will hold a grudge and make your sessions into a power play. But if you reject them personally, emotionally and or romantically all hell breaks loose, especially attention wise. It shouldn’t have to be like that.

Leaving is the better option even if it seems difficult or not possible at first. Trying to work it out, giving another chance is just a gaslighting trap.

They will probably still take you leaving as rejection but at that point it’s their problem to sit with, not yours. They can’t take it out on you or use it against you.

I never actually knew my therapist until those hidden moments when they break character. I wish I never met them and all I can say is they have a lot of work to do before they can call themself a therapist. Or treat someone else. A degree alone should not give the right to call someone a therapist.

The only thing I feel bad about is the next person that has to deal with the therapist and what happened between me and the therapist is projected onto the patient. There is nothing more dangerous than a therapist‘s unchecked projections and their countertransference.

It's honestly a little funny. I've had so many shitty, shitty experiences in therapy, a lot of it stemming from financial abuse in the healthcare system, and my caseworker took it upon herself to try and find me a therapist outside the community mental health system as a result. She recommended someone personally and she seemed pretty good, albeit maybe a bit scattered and nervous. I did have the red flag that maybe she was oversharing a bit.

Anyway, out of four appointments she canceled two. Second one was a week ago and she didn't respond back to my rescheduling text that was a response to her cancellation text.

I'm just over all this shit. Wrote more but I'm just tired of it all and deleted it.

On the upside, I did help start an art meetup and that went really well honestly. Therapy usually just makes me feel awful, but hanging out with a bunch of weirdo artists and everyone talking about their hopes and uncertainties with their art and getting energized about it really felt good. I'm thinking less mental health system, more art.

I see in other trauma or any other mental health forums/media that therapy is unquestionable. I find this very triggering. There are peoole who blame people sharing bad experiences. Like this reddit is probably only space where i can safely express my hurt, and feelings from experiencing gaslighting, devaluation and harm in therapy. In other places whenever i share this i always feel misunderstood, attacked and devalued - like i dont have a right to feel this way and my expectations caused this. Hard to process this in this kind of reality when even other people with similar issues will attack you if you share experience that threaten their reality. Majority of people see therapists as unquestionable figures, Experts and the ones everyone should listen to.

I left therapy 1.5 years ago, and I still don’t fully understand what happened
It’s been a hell of an experience, and I still feel a lot of guilt and shame.
I started therapy after a breakup and because I was struggling with relationships in general. I knew absolutely nothing about therapy, but I was sad all the time, so I decided to give it a try, following all the advice I kept seeing on the internet. A girl I knew gave me the number of a therapist, I texted her, and I went to my first appointment.

She was exactly my type, and she was seven years older than me. I had a lot of difficulties with women, so I didn’t say anything about my attraction for the first 8–10 months, but I really liked her. To the point where I was thinking about her sexually all the time.
After about eight months, she told me she thought I was developing feelings for her. “I think something is happening here,” she said. I immediately admitted that I found her really attractive, thinking she might be able to help me work through it.

From that point on, things became hell on earth.
I started talking about my attraction to her, how much I liked her, her dresses, and so on. Her response was always just “thank you,” and then she would completely ignore it. The sessions mostly consisted of me talking about random things happening in my life. Basically, every week I would tell her what was going on, and she would listen and make some comments. At least once a month, though, I would tell her I liked her or compliment her during a session, and she would just smile and say “thank you.”

One time, I got really physically close to her, telling her “I really care about you.” [I know I had problems, and I eventually worked through them on my own, but at the time I was struggling badly.] She just looked at me, smiled, and said, “See you next Wednesday.”
This shitshow went on for about a year.

I complimented her, she accepted the compliments, and then ignored the whole thing. After a while, I started crying in front of her because of how painful the situation had become. When that happened, she told me I should consider taking medication. I did, but things got even worse. By that point, about a year and a half into therapy, I had gone from being sad to feeling completely broken and suicidal, thinking about her all the time.

Still, I kept going to therapy and taking the medication because she kept telling me, “Trust me, it will get better.” and she gave me the idea that all of that was completely normal. But I was going crazy.

One day, I told her, “I feel like shit. I can’t go on like this anymore.” She got a little angry and told me that this was her job, that she wanted to do it, and that even if I loved her, it was still her job to help me.
So I asked her if I could hug her. She replied, “We can talk about that next Wednesday.” She would say things like that whenever I asked difficult questions, putting them off until the next session and then never bringing them up again.

That day, I hit rock bottom. I couldn’t even cry anymore. I just felt empty.
From the following session onward, I started getting really angry.

I told her that my attraction to her had become a problem. She replied, “I don’t understand why it should be an obstacle.”
At that point, I lost it. I told her she was incompetent, that she was using me, and that she didn’t respect me.

I went to two or three more sessions after that, trying to talk about what had happened between us. But she was always evasive. She would remain silent or say, “We can talk about that,” without ever actually talking about it.

Eventually, I told her, “This is our last session.”
She said there was no need to end therapy. I told her that she only wanted my money, and she denied it, saying that it wasn’t even that much money. When I asked her why we were still doing this, then, she replied, “It seems obvious to me what we’re doing here.”
Another vague answer that didn’t explain anything.

The last thing I said to her was, “You’re beautiful. I wish you could have been my wife.”
She replied, “I’ll think about you and hope you’ll be okay.”
Then we hugged for 10–20 seconds, in silence, and I ran away from there. She said “see you ag…” then she stopped and said “Bye”, and i did “👍” with my hand.

I never paid for the last month of therapy. I stopped taking the medication right after and moved to another country, which had already been part of my plans anyway (i didn’t do it before because of her, and she knew it, she also talked about how beautiful our city was, implying to not go away).

This experience absolutely destroyed me. It’s been 1.5 years, and I still have nightmares about it. I still feel a lot of attraction to her, and I’ve spent more than a year feeling deeply depressed and suicidal after the whole thing.

I don’t really know what to make of this experience. I still struggle to understand what happened, and I carry a lot of guilt and shame about it.

I guess I’m writing this because I need to put it into words and hear from other people. Was it a form of abuse? Wtf happened? I’m trying to study psychology to understand something, but all of this was very confusing and traumatic.

For the longest time I believed that I needed therapy, and all of the bad therapists I have encountered were just an obstacle to get the final good therapist. I have lost count how many therapists I have seen in the last few years, which most of them caused more harm than good and would say the most ridiculous and ignorant things (the one before told me reading the Epstein files can help victims of abuse)

I started therapy with a new therapist this year and I felt relieved that I finally met the right therapist and can 'heal' my trauma and felt like this is what I needed for my life to go to the right direction.

However too many red flags accumulated overtime to the point I quit therapy altogether and I don't think it is 'bad matches' but the whole industry is bad.

First of all, I have countless experiences of psychologists saying the most heinous judgemental things that make me feel bad. Many of them would just make up unfalsifiable things to prove that I am 'broken'. Then if they can implant the idea that I am fundamentally broken then I would keep seeing them and they would get a fat check. I had a psychologist told me that because of my trauma, my brain structure is altered, even things like I enjoyed metal music cos I was abused!? Another one told me my nervous system became 'stuck' because of the trauma and she can help me 'unstuck' it. All of them would talk to me like a child.

And all of the psychologist I encountered CANNOT handle any disagreement. So they make some unfalsifiable claims about my brain, or behave in a rude manner, if I point it out, they get MAD and started acting defensive, deflective or even drop me as a client. One psychologist got mad cos her method made me feel worse (she made me imagine how it feels like to want to suicide to demonstrate her point) and her reply was 'I went to university for 5 years, maybe you don't need to see someone as qualified as me'????? Like their fragile ego cannot handle their client challenging them or even telling them they made you feel worse!!!

There is just an innate power imbalance that makes psychologists do things I wouldn't tolerate a friend doing and they get away from it cos they aren't breaking any laws**, and also you are brainwashed to think this is good for you and this is what you need in your life, so you suck up the bad behaviour.

Also most of them always give me the most generic advice: think positively, do breathing exercises, do yoga, let's talk more next session...I always end the session feeling like there is something unanswered...

The current therapist just showed her true colour in my last session. She would always say some passive aggressive condescending things but I let it slide because I wanted to get help and trusted her as a professional (see the power imbalance?) Recently I got mistreated at school and instead of offering any practical advice and sympathy, she judged me and said 'you don't know what your classmates are going through, it might be trauma that makes them behave that way' (unfalsifiable claim), and I said 'it doesn't matter the cause, they are bullying everyone???' and she said 'are you using your time wisely by arguing with me here?' I told her I travelled LONG AND FAR to see her and she has the audacity to accuse ME for not using my time wisely? I was so mad I left and she didn't even apologise except wrote a generic 'sorry if I offended you, let me know if you want another session' email.

yeah...right...I don't want anyone to treat me this way and these shrinks are just fancy assholes with a 5 year degree... with no empathy, sympathy, scientific thinking and life experience. Most of them are from upper middle class background to afford such education and don't understand me when I say I am stressed about paying my bills and rent. They would keep asking me 'why don't you follow your dreams' yeah

yeah right...

completely useless

** the most insulting thing is that it's hard to seek legal actions against these douchebags. Unless it's something obviously breaking the laws. It's because they are the EXPERTS, they are the psychologists, they have 'power' to write the final narrative, so even if you file a lawsuit, they can write that you are the ill client that's 'resisting' their well meaning advice...UGHHH...so we don't even have rights...

After reading several “grief” books therapists have written and talked to many therapists about my own grief, I was shocked at how totally wrong they were about my feelings and what they thought was the “best” way for me and others, particularly children, to manage grief.

Long story short, I was fortunate to grow up with a lot of good guidance from adults in my life (not perfect but the wisdom was communicated to me in a way I understood at varying ages of life). This wisdom came from many people, and one of those people was my own mother, multiple aunts, and older sisters of my friends. These are all "older" women and girls who cared about younger girls and women. I also want to include some trans-women in this because I have friends like that who get it too.

Anyway.

And then I decided to go to therapy...when I was 18 and freshly traumatized from SA. I also thought I needed meds because I was feeling such intense existensial agony...stunted me and could have ruined my life (long story short) so I stopped that.

Anyway.

I worked with a rather accomplished and established psychotherapists (you have his non-profit on your lips but I dare not say it and risk identifying him here) who pretty much ruined my life at the time.

He was the first therapist who made the suggestive comment about my "looks" getting in the way of my life (or mostly blamed me for any trauma I've had at the agency of other people. He randomly said I was intimidating, naturally, I asked why and he proceeded to give me the silent treatment.

I cant talk about it in to much detail, but at the age of 9 I was in a clinic for half a year for diagnosis. Among the abuse I expierinced was sexual abuse.

I remember everything little thing, but I just realised I cant remember taking a single shower or even cleaning myself with a washcloth. I must have either cleaned myself, or have been cleaned. But i dont remember it. I even remember brushing my teeth. I had visitiors that would have noticed If I stank. Hell I even know how the brand of body wash looked. I dont remember Using it!

I am scared and panicking right know, I know the stuff I remember and how horrible they are. I dont know If its was just that irrelevant, or If Im repressing something realy bad.

I’ve had over 30 therapists since I was a child. Some were fine, clueless but harmless, but some fill me with such incredible anger just thinking about them. Don’t know how to get through the anger so naming names, idgaf.

Tom Horvath, the founder of Smart Recovery, sexually harassed me and made comments about my hair, looks and body. I could feel him gazing at my chest. I went to his clinic seeking help for my cptsd and trusted him. He and his entire clinic at practical recovery in San Diego are inappropriate and complete hacks.

Another therapist Dr. Dalfsen I saw for almost six years, three times a week. She said I would need to continue to see her multiple times for the rest of my life. She would sit and not say a word as I lay on her couch confiding in a narcissist who I could tell hated me. After telling her I struggled with drinking too much on weekends, she called my parents and told them I was an alcoholic and should be placed in a recovery facility. To this day my parents think I’m a raging alcoholic and I’m not.

Another therapist recommended by my boss (never again) said that I would burn in hell for not letting Jesus into my heart. I’m an ex Mormon so this was traumatic for me. She made me hold a baby doll and rock it back and forth talking to it like it was me. When I refused she lost her sanity and said i didn’t want to get better and never would since I love satan.

These are just a few stories of many but in every scenario, every therapist came highly recommended, had 25+ years of experience, and most often a PhD. Highly regarded in their communities.

My narcissistic mother who abused me and all five of my sisters became a therapist. She is super religious and has told me multiple times I am going to burn in hell.

These people are out there ruining lives and taking money from innocent victims. I just wish there was justice for all the people on this forum.

Talk therapy is information gathering disguised as Treatment.

The mental health system calls its talk therapies “evidence-based” while dismissing diet, nature and other alternatives.

But behind the soft conversations is a machinery of manipulation that will never solve your problems. Session after session they subtly hijack your narrative so you will reveal more and more. They make you doubt yourself on purpose and use intermittent reinforcement so you will look up to them.

If you ever read your psychiatric files: watch how your words get distorted, reframed, pathologized and turned into labels. Notice the obsession with targeting your behavior and credibility rather than actually helping you.

Meanwhile they push behavior altering drugs. Often starting with antidepressants. Sometimes these are described in your files as tools to “stabilize behavior.” But to your face, they're selling you the chemical imbalance, neuroplasticity or even the insulin of psychiatry story.

Most side effects often don't even make it into those files. Instead, they might write something like: “Patient believes symptoms are caused by medication.”

It's very dehumanizing. It's manipulation. It's gaslighting. It has nothing to do with healthcare at all.

Dutch GGZ is pure epistemic and chemical violence that gets served with a friendly smile and a soft infantilizing tone.

The fact that you sometimes feel better for a few days after a conversation has nothing to do with their expertise. It’s a normal response to human connection. Don’t let these people exploit that.

I've arrived at the conclusion that most of these people operate on the intent of doing harm. I spent too much time trying to figure out why they did what they did to me because on some level I feel their influence on me was a kin to something from a cult where I even know am trying to get rid of the harmful models they impacted onto me. But more, I realised I was using this forced framework to understand these people and that's just not plausible. You don't do and create the harm that you do if you in essence were a good person, they simply are not. I remember this particular woman, speaking on that learned nasal pretend monotonic voice they do which she would immediately change upon any disagreement from you to incorporate a threat; she would instantly switch into a lower deeper tone and start speaking as normal humans do "if you don't do this, I can't guarantee there won't be consequences for you", as to maximise the threat (I was questioning what the point was and quitting) only to immediately go back to the pretend holy detached voice. The intent was harm and access, the intent was to create hurt. There was no other intent on their part. These people are predators, wolves in sheeps clothing. I wish I had listened to my gut feeling all those years back, when it was screaming at me to get out.

I wouldnt say this is abuse. Im just dissapointed.

So I started going to a therapist for ocd and ERP. ERP is different than most therapies, you're supposed to sit with uncertainty or whatever the obsession is without doing compulsions which could include reviewing, reassurance, looking for evidence, trying to solve the uncertainty.

The first ERP therapist I went to just made me explain all my trauma upfront. I told him its been the first year anniversary since my friend died of suicide and he asked me how he did it. And then he didnt explain anything about ERP.

The second ERP therapist I saw, its like he diagnosed me with OCD but after a couple months it felt like he wasn't able to even identify what ocd im still struggling with. I mentioned how Im so nervous to apply to grad school to become a therapist. I told him that I was stuck, I kept thinking people are going to judge me (this was because of an ocd because i had an intrusive thought about my supervisor, argued with the thought, and then ive been avoiding him for the past year), and I keep getting stuck in what ifs... what if i do all this work and it isnt for me.. just never feeling satisfied in the career search even though i think this is the best route for me.. Ive literally been thinking and stuck on this decision for 2 years. When I brought this up to the therapist, he didnt even ask about why I was nervous, he just told me my anxiety is normal and told me I should consider do something else.. which is not what ERP is nor was I asking for advice.

The third ERP therapist I saw was terrible. I brought her an imaginary script about grad school. So basically you have to say like what you think the worst outcomes could be and then you have to sit with the uncertainty that it may or may not happen without doing any compulsions. Well, all she did was reassure me. She reassured me that I wont be judged because people changed their minds all the times. She told me that I will probably get in. She also gave me advice on how to apply even though she doesnt even know what she is talking about (like she said i need to do a GRE which isnt true).

But yeah. Basically I went to exposure therapy and got unsolicited reassurance and advice.

I posted month or so ago about my therapist sexually harassing me and after a tiring series of reports, he has been fired!! Not for sexually harassing me, but for lying about his credentials from what I’ve heard. I’ll take what I can get, though! He admitted to someone involved with the case that he was being sexually inappropriate with me and he will no longer work with young women, I don’t think he knows he’s never getting a job in this field again, but good riddance! I’m so happy it’s finally over. Early on, I had to share my story in a private room with a male detective and it was so triggering and I’m just happy it seems like I won’t ever have to be in a room like that again and i’ve been offered solely female providers in my general medical care. I don’t really see myself doing therapy again.

This happened a few years ago and thought it fit the sub.

I got this new therapist and I had to explain my problems. One of my problems is that I have a hard time dealing with the suffering and injustices of the world, including the war in Ukraine. I said it makes me feel suicidal often. Then the therapist said if I kill myself I would be just as bad as Putin because I will hurt people (my family and friends) just like Putin is hurting people. I walked out and terminated contact with this therapist immediately after.

Edit: he also told me I wasn't depressed because then I would just lay in bed all day and not even show up to therapy

dpss mental health assessment person told me my brain is "broken." I feel ill add to this later but once I process this in my body its gonna feel awful.

Why do these people act like therapists are all knowing gods or "proffesionals", i had ten psychs and therapists since i was a teen and none helped me. i had to help myself and succeded. most of them said my mother screams bc she cares. none of them called her a narc like she is.

but i made a post today about something and made the mistake of sharing that i used to have ED OVER A DECADE AGO. i said im 48kg at 5'0 and my mother threatends to frobid me from going to the gym and threatends she will tell my psychiatrist im too thin if i get even thinner and tells me i will get locked in a psychward. mind u when i was 40kg at same weight a year after recovering from ed she told me to loose weight.

and im petite besides being short, im 26yo, and have too much fat and fat folds still so i am allowed to be thinner as long as im not unhealthy or lose my period. YET ALL THESE PPL ACCUSED ME OF STILL HAVING ED AND TOLD ME TO GET "PROFFESIONAL HELP". dont make me laugh. my first therapist solution to my anorexia was making my mother try to feed me junk. nothing in my post suggested i have ed anymore, wanting to lose fat is not always an ed ffs. if other women r allowed to not have too much fat folds then why im not? its not like im severly thin, im not even thin, just slim kind of, a lot of women i see are slimmer than me yet they are allowed but im not allowed to decide ab my body. and i only had anorexia for two fucking years, almost two. over a fuckign decade ago, and ppl say ur mother just cares !!!!!! mind u she abused me WAY BEFORE THAT as a vulnerable sensitive autistic child. yet she gets understanding from all therapists and people online, never gets told she needs therapy. atp therapy is weponized against ppl with valid feelings and reactions jfc, sometimes i cant even write eratically online bc humans will scream YOU NEED THERAPYY !!!!!!!!!!!!! at me. like a broken record it became so fucking common.

my mother and whole family is unhealthy and mock my healthy diet and exercise, they think healthy is chubby. they all are having health issues. and even my nephaw is obese, they feed him junk they mock him for being fat, yet i need therapy. ok.

like why its seen as okay to tell someone they need therapy even if they dont? youre literally saying this to an ACTUAL STRANGER. and atp we have to acknowledge its a little abusive, and therapy gets weaponzied.

no therapy helped me in 12yo long derpression. i managed it myself and now im not depressed anymore, i have high mental and physical energy at all the time, yet my history makes ppl tell me that its not possible im not depressed anymore and they r highly suspicious of me and my psych doesnt allow me to not have to take pills(which i pretend to take) bc of my history. fucking lol. they think they have the right to control me. an adult person. they dont allow me to stop going to psych and therapist. they say i NEED THEM. one therapist say i wont manage without her. guess what. i did.

i went to therapists since i was a teen. im 26. none warned me about how my mother will destroy me.

they just say she cares bc parents care. and here i am, highly sensitive and autistic still living with her in contant stress and turmoil. for years i layed in bed and closed myself in my room to avoid her, i had catatonic depression. i never got ay help or understanding that my mom is an abuisve narc. she screams at me everyday, it has no end, shes alwasy anrgy scraming cursing irritated and raging. she always blames me for everything even if i have nothing to do with to do with it. shes low consciounsess, toxic and primitive. being close to her makes me shake, i wanna scrum my body in the shower. i hate her so fucking much, she terrifies me. i have no help irl everyone here is so fucking stupid and my mother has dominated me. i cant even tell anything to my psych whos an old woman, a mismatch to me and also doesnt defend me from my mothers abuse, she just tries to feed me pills. and today my reaction to my mothers raging at me got me told its bc i dont take pills. apparently if u react to abuse u need pills. but she screamed whole life and she doesnt need them? yk what she told me? she screams bc she cares. yeah that makes total sense. screaming at a hsp person totally does anything good.

I always get told an external locus of control is unhealthy and a cognitive distortion and that I should develop an internal locus of control.

But isn't an external locus of control just mostly correct? So much is determined when you're born and you have no control over those things at all. Your family, nationality, religious background, sex, gender, sexuality, appearance, intelligence, disabilities, economic status, language.

And then there are so many things that (can) happen in life you have no control over. Illness, accidents, conflict, abuse and probably much more.

So how much control do we really have? Certainly not as much as therapists like me to believe.