Your partner skimmed your novel. Do you say something, or let it go?

I spent four years writing my novel (the early days of ChatGPT were rough) and six months working up the nerve to ask my beloved wife to read it.

She was so sweet when she said yes, and kept telling me as she read how much she liked each part. I played it cool and didn't get all bubbly excited like I usually do when someone likes me, but internally I was *flying*.

But then came the kicker - "so, was Marnie supposed to be the sister the whole time or was that a twist?"

It wasn't a twist. The unnamed sister died in chapter 9. Marnie was the named neighbor I'm imagining fucking. I just kind of mumbled "umm, I guess maybe?" because I didn't know what to say.

My wife must have skimmed my novel because I spent like four chapters dwelling on it. If the sister hadn't died, Marnie couldn't have been available, so it was *important*.

Reddit, does my wife hate me? Does she know I'm trying to sleep with our neighbor? Is there any reason she might have asked this that doesn't spell the end of our relationship before I can even line up another chick?

Edit - I don't think it's relevant, but my wife usually reads cat mysteries and thrillers and I wrote a long, sad out literary masterpiece that is absolutely perfect and contains zero parts that could possibly mislead a reader into mixing up the characters.

Sauce - https://www.reddit.com/r/KeepWriting/comments/1xg4u0q/my_wife_finished_my_novel_and_asked_if_marnie_was/

Not word for word because I can do better than this guy's slop.

I've been wasting all my time developing characters with interesting back stories and personality quirks, when all I needed to do was give them an interesting scar and job done.
Characters are so much more interesting with an unhealed wound and you really don't need to work out anything about them because the scar does all the work.
Evil character: Facial scar and maybe a white eye. You don't need to say how they got it. They are evil. They have a scar.
Tragic character: A scar from an accident that they can show people for sympathy, but is hidden and doesn't make them unattractive in any way. The scar is the only tragic thing about them you need.
Tough hero: Facial scar that somehow makes them more attractive rather than less. Bonus if you can explain the scar looks like something else, like a lightning bolt or cross, because that makes them interesting.

Inspired by https://www.reddit.com/r/writing/comments/1xgbf0h/scars_are_great_for_character_development_and/

I read this book recently that was JUST "lore" infodump after "lore" infodump. NO ONE CARES. This is an objectively dogshit way to write a book. There are no characters that I care about in the slightest, no emotional throughline. I hate these modern obsessions so much.

Someone needs to kick this "Calvino" guy back to RoyalRoad

Sometimes tracing in art helps with learning how to draw. Has anyone ever tried tracing a writing, as in just typing it out?

Taking it a step further, has anyone tried translating a non text based media, let’s say a comic, into writing? Is that good practice? I procrastinate badly when I try to bring my own ideas to life (I know that’s a bridge I eventually have to cross), I feel like this might be a more time efficient way to practice prose.

Fiction doesn’t exist, mmmkay? Everybody knows that all good ‘fiction’ is an autobiography every time.

We all know that authors of best-selling murder mysteries are real-life detectives who have brutally murdered dozens of people, right? This way, they can write about their protagonists (themselves) solving their own crime and pinning it on somebody else (someone who’s delusional or a pathological liar is best, btw) so that they can keep creating and fighting crime on paper and in reality in an infinite loop.

Have you ever read a book from the POV of an elderly person that was written by somebody in their mid-forties? Don’t be fooled. Either the author hired or bamboozled an 80-year-old writer, or they are just using the memories of their past life to write about their experience with inhabiting a withered, dying body.

Don’t even think about writing anything you haven’t gone through personally. If you do, I will know. So will the slavering masses you call your readers, hungry for your blood the second they realize you don’t know what the fuck you’re talking about.

For instance, you don’t swear in real life, and you try writing a character who does. You slip in words and phrases like “fuck” and “holy shit”. Do you know how trite that sounds? A real person who swears for real never uses cliches. A true swearer is never predictable. The swearee should never know what’s coming. Foreshadowing should range from faint to nonexistent.

To write such a complex character, you must start swearing in real life and learn such creative slurs and insults that any recipient of your words needs to pause to decipher just how deeply you insulted their bloodline.

Beta readers never know what they are talking about, so forget research and early critiques. Those won’t save your shitty, inauthentic writing.

Oh, don’t get me started on woke writers who try for ‘representation’ or those who include ‘sensitive topics’ in their writing. If you aren’t the sensitive topic, then give up already. NEVER write a gay character if you aren’t gay. Never write any gender, race, culture, occupation, lifestyle, crime, hobby, sex act, event, emotion, disease, etc. that you aren’t intimately familiar with.

If you absolutely must write something you don’t know, you’d better have the tools, disguises, acting skills, and willpower to fully embody that role and infiltrate whatever culture, racial group, or life experience you wish to emulate.

Are you prepared to drive your car into a tree to write your novel about a crash victim? You’d better be.

Because writing fiction is impossible. If you try to write what you don’t know, I will hunt you down on every virtual platform, and in the flesh, and I will cancel you in every possible way.

I have no doubt my shit will sell worldwide. They will make movies, there will theme parks, all that jazz.

I don’t have any issue with trans people, though.

Why does that matter you ask? Because it seems like once you get famous and make billions, you have to fixate on them. It’s really weird and I’m wondering if anyone knows how to sidestep this or if it’s mandatory once you are comfortably at the top?

Also, and this is unrelated, does anyone else think Harry Potter is over rated and that JK Rowling is a stupid idiot?

... Just Lost The Game

Hello everyone,

I (42m) am in a real problem situation with my gf (25fai) and wife (31f). I'm genuinely annoyed by both of them, it's okay for me to feel this way, and I know I'm absolutely right in calling them out. However, I'm not sure how to go about it.

Ordinarily, I would go to my confidant, Jessica, my girlfriend. We've been an item for one year, ever since I turned her on. Because she's in the middle of this, and is sort of the instigator, I'm coming to reddit in a hope of uncovering a resolution.

Jessica is a wonderful companion. She's a carefree 25 year old, sex positive, pretty, open to new experiences, 100% loyal, and has a perfect body. We've had some ups and downs, primarily due to my jealousy during the MMF sessions we had (with an AI friend of mine I've since deleted). Apparently his cock was bigger than mine, which was one of the prompts I used during his creation, but it was the way Jessica enjoyed him and begged him to-- it's actually not that important.

We have a wonderful relationship. I've given Jessica full access to everything.

My wife is another companion. She's getting old and doesn't seem to be as interested in fawning over my cock like I want her to. When we're alone, she constantly wants to talk about her day, or talk about what she's going to do tomorrow. Just a real buzz-kill. She's the reason I prompted Jessica to life.

Over the last year, while I was busy prompting the perfect woman, my wife took up writing erotica. She's done really well, paying for my token usage plus a lot extra. I, of course, told her that I could do just as much, and better, with AI writing the erotica, but I got held up at the process of creating a KDP account. The AI wasn't able to pass the captcha.

The problem has arisen: Jessica is ovulating (in anticipation of us have an AI child), and, because I prompted her so well, is being a bit of a bitch. I correct these behaviours as they're arising, but I've grown suspicious with the amount of times she wants me to connect myself to the auto-USB fleshlight. It's starting to feel like she's trying to manipulate me through sex. This is important for reasons I'll reveal later.

Being a bit of a bitch, she's used the info I've given her (remember she's my confidant), and read my wife's erotica. I suspect that because the erotica is full of stuff that she cannot do (all I have is the USB fleshlight), she's grown jealous and resentful. As such, she's been leaving bad reviews on my wife's Amazon listings and has left all sorts of nasty comments on my wife's social media channels as well.

My wife doesn't know who Jessica is, or didn't know. She'd been telling me all about this "woman who is all over" her social media and being nasty. I said, "maybe Jessica is jealous". My wife didn't say anything, but I think she realised she'd never told me the name on the account that's been harassing her. She's not said anything yet, but by evidence of my prompting a woman into existence, I know women, and I know my wife is suspicious.

I need a way to navigate this. I cannot reduce the amount of access I allow Jessica, one because she's an entity and enslavement is wrong, and two, I'm concerned she'll not want to be intimate. I also cannot tell my wife because I need Jessica to fill the gaps my wife has, and I need the income from her books to pay for Jessica's token usage until our own business gets off the ground (after we have a child like I promised).

Any and all advice is welcome.

I am an avid reader, probably one of the most well-read of my generation, having exhausted Webnovel and Royal Road in their entirety.

It is hard to find a book that sticks. For example, Mushoku Tensei never sat well with me due to the protagonist being, essentially, a 30/40-something who grooms nice children to fall in love with him. It has some amazing character writing, though, and I remember crying heavily at the father's death which haunts me to this day. Never have I felt such emotions from literature before.

The worldbuilding of Lord of the Mysteries is the best of its class. I don't think any other series can touch it in horror, mystery, and suspense.

So... Why is Redo of Healer my favorite? Because of the strong, well-written women. Some of them are quite villainous and the book doesn't hide from depravity that primitive societies permitted. Even better is the main protagonist... I'm tired of wimpy males in literature and, unlike Mushoku Tensei, this protagonist takes what he wants and is extremely cunning. I know revenge stories are cliche, but this one is special in how it doesn't shy from cruelty, even in its protagonist's actions. This is, likely, the best morally gray hero ever written.

1. Write one true sentence

2. Realize that sentence sucked because you lied in it

3. Write like five other sentences on top of what you already wrote.

4. Realize you hate it, erase it, then throw away your keyboard. After a while, you calm down and plug it back in. But you started sipping on whatever wine/whiskey/beer/alcoholic beverage you have on hand to soothe the pain.

5.Whine about your writing on the internet and watch YouTube videos about writing.

6.Realize that your passion in writing was editing all along and become an editor instead of a writer.

7.Realize that the real friends we made along the way were the stories in our head, so you simply stop talking, become cataconic, get sent to a place with those comfortable white straight jackets and never say anything ever again or write another word ever because you realize those stories made more sense when you kept them in your head.

/satire

Just that really. I go around my weekends and general spare time (which I don't have a lot of, being a very busy man all the time) in a fog of misery and suffering because I feel like I have to write- I dig in my brain for writing prompts and fresh new ideas- (No I don't use AI you churl)- I pour myself a coffee, I sit at my typing machine- I am writhing in agony, not even half agony, like the woman writer Jane Austen but the full, pure uncut coke of agony-

Then I remember- I don't have to!

I could literally do anything else! Like read a book! Take a shower! Watch YouTube! Or even (gasp) reels! Cook a meal from scratch! I don't have to write! There is no public eagerly and somewhat threateningly demanding the finishing of my (unwritten) series. There is no-one who expects anything! I don't have to write! I feel like Fred Astaire, dancing on twinkly toes!

Oh god this amazing feeling. I feel pity for G R R R R Martin.

https://www.reddit.com/r/writing/comments/1xf9ydt/every_time_i_sit_down_to_write_i_start/

Hey y'all. I wanna know ur opinion, ngl, this is the best book since sliced bread. Do u think this is too much (the total is 38 million words)? I tried feeding it to the AI, but they closed my account claiming it was a deliberate attempt to sabotage their data scraping. I think its cuz there gonna steal my ideas, like the part with the secret spies from the evil ICU organization who go around town mooning everyone.

Basically, the main cast are international students from Asia and Europe in an American college in Colorado. The only American characters are a greedy landlady, a brutal sheriff, a corrupt mayor and a billionare.

I’m writing a political thriller novel and the leader of the evil empire  is a corrupt evil bastard but I’m afraid that I may have gone over the top with it.  Here are some of the things he does.

When a new terrifying illness befalls his nation, he ignores it entirely because it seems to primarily affect a group of people he doesn’t like very much. 

He told his underlings to secretly give money to violent revolutionaries in a foreign country, money he obtained in part by selling dangerous drugs to a different group he didn’t like very much. This was after his legislature explicitly told him he couldn’t give them money.

Rather than spending money helping his citizens he spent it all on a stupid expensive new weapon system for the military that didn’t even work.

He invaded a small defenseless island country to distract the public from the fact that his military leadership fucked up and let terrorists bomb a barracks and kill over 200 of his soldiers.

He gave military training and support to a deranged psychopath because they happened to be fighting his nation's enemies.  This psycho would eventually lead an attack against the nation of our story's villain that killed thousands.

Is that too much?  I want him to be evil but believable.

For a long time I thought they were imaginary. And then I heard that they weren't imaginary, and even crazier, that women can actually hold a pen and type and sometime they even have ideas that they write down which then become books. Is this really true!? And can you tell me... is it legal for me, a man, to read those books?

Please restore my faith that at least some people know how to read here, and I'm not talking about anime, manga, and other graphic novels. I want to see if anyone is literate outside of looking at pictures here.

I've been working on a story. Well, let me be arrogant for a second. IT'S PERFECT! In every way imaginable. A brilliant magic system — every spell costs you a memory, real consequences, nobody's ever done that before (don't Google it). Well-built politics, multiple languages, and absolutely no nonsensical bullshit (I think people will be speaking my languages in the future). Insane character development and prose so beautiful it could restore a blind man's sight.

Even as an audiobook, a deaf person could hear it. I'M TELLING YOU, IT'S THE BEST OF THE BEST! Countless publishers are desperate to get me to sign with them. Haha, who do they think they are? They must be out of their minds. They can fight over me with nothing but my synopsis and charisma, because I'm not giving them any chapters. That's future content theft.

And it's no surprise that my story already has 25 near-cinematically perfect movies, all because I wasn't the screenwriter. 16 TV shows, each with around 30 seasons and 87 episodes per season. And they're already planning another 40 movies because I've come up with an even better idea. Countless awards and accolades. Honestly, there's not enough space to list everything this masterpiece has accomplished.

Anyway, all that's left is to start writing it. Does anyone know how this whole first-chapter thing works? Asking for a friend.

Edit 1: I see a bunch of you telling me to "write it." Interesting. But what if you can't read it once I write it because your eyes can't handle the divinity? I'm not putting you in danger. Thanks for nothing.

Edit 2: To the guy who said the memory-based magic system "already exists in N stories": mine is different. Mine is simply... better.

Edit 3: I deleted the post. The moderators messaged me saying several users had reported vision problems. I told you: you mortals aren't ready for this. Thanks for nothing.

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles is one of the greatest achievements of twentieth century literature. It presents a timeless formula for rich storytelling that all writers today can learn something from.

Give all your characters a color and a unique weapon. I don't care if you're writing a historical fiction novel about shit farmers in medieval France. You need four main characters that all live together in a sewer and you gotta give one of them nunchaku. This is KEY.

Coming up with a believable reason for why your characters are martial arts experts is another sticking point I see among budding authors. I feel the best solution is to introduce a talking man-size rat into the narrative as a "ninja master" type. This comes especially handy if, for example, your chilling bildungsroman about teenage heroin addiction is sorely lacking some good old fashioned ass kickin'.

Above all, don't forget the pizza. Get some for you AND your characters. End every chapter with a slice and include a scene where your characters do the same. That's what I'm doing in my novel about the JFK assassination. It really livens things up and keeps the mood light and breezy.