I suffer from severe chronic dissociation, and obviously several other standard mental health things that go along with that. It's been going on for a decade, every second of my life; therapy isn't an option (not out of choice, I'm sure many of you know how the NHS is)
For years, while not helping at all with my symptoms, but more stress outlet, going to the gym has been my main and only support. I got diagnosed with a hernia recently which is causing a lot of pain, and I've had to step away from the gym, reluctantly. I always do better off medication, but for context, this feels as bad as when you're withdrawing cold turkey from meds. I have so much stress I can't get rid of, because there is no suitable alternative I can think of that can replace gym temporarily.
I have other outlets, like playing music, writing music etc, but it doesn't come close and there probably isn't really anything anyone can suggest, but I thought I'd see. My mental health is getting really bad again, and people in my circles just think it's a minor inconvenience, or that I've done this to myself by going to the gym anyway, and use that as a confirmation bias on why the gym is so bad for you, it's better to just stay relatively inactive all your life, blah blah. If I didn't go I don't think I’d even had made it this far.
It's coming up to the 10 year anniversary since I lost my sense of self to chronic dissociation, I feel worse when it's darker too, I just feel like everything's happening all at once and I don't particularly even want to keep trying any more. I can walk some times, but even this is pot luck as sometimes even a short walk round the corner can cause excruciating pain, but even that doesn't scratch the itch of getting stress out, and walking around where I live depresses me in itself. Thanks if you're able to offer any advice