Love is beautiful 🩷

Traveled from Texas -> Ireland

Ive been here about a week now and its just been perfect, everything i could've dreamed of and more. He treats me like such a princess its unbelievable! I love him with all my heart

my boyfriend (M29) and I (F28) have been doing long distance for over 3 years. almost a year and a half in different continents, and 2 years in the same country but different cities. we finally both have jobs in the same city, in a third country for both of us, and just moved in together. here’s our first night together meal :)
i’m over the moon! it still feels unreal🥹 so here’s some happy story that it’s possible to survive long distance, and it’s possible to make it happen even in a country where neither is native. moments like this are worth every part of the struggle ❤️

I’m 32F and he’s 31M I went to Canada from US to see him. We met on discord almost 2 years ago. Life is great c: he makes me happy

I (M24) left her (F23) to study abroad. It was a very hard decision, but I thought I could do it. I got a very good scholarship, which I thought I couldn't pass up.

Now it has been nearly two months, and I simply cannot function. I cannot study, I cannot focus in class, I am so depressed. All I feel is this constant dread towards everything. When we call I am fine, but as soon as we hang up it's back to feeling absolutely miserable.

It makes it even worse that she's in a similar situation herself (although she tries not to show it too much).

Now, I just think to myself that no amount of money, education, or anything really is worth this pain. She has become my whole world and I need to go back to her.

I'll be jobless. People will ask too many questions. I'll be almost broke (since I spent most of my savings to settle here). But I don't care. I'll be with her.

I don't know if I'm making a mistake. I really don't know.

everyone shares big date night ideas but i feel like the small stuff does more. like grocery shopping on facetime, working in silence, falling asleep on call. what's yours?

What are you guys timezone difference? Mine is 3 hours and because of his work schedule and my sleep schedule it feels like such a big difference bc it doesn’t really work which is INSANE because it’s only 3 HOURS.

I would say that me and my ldr boyfriend spends a lot of our time focusing on forming a deep emotional bond rather than the physical intimacy. Since we are so far away, the only way for us to be intimate with each other is talking and deep conversations. We've gotten to know each other on a completely other level despite the relationship being quite new because we talk every day for hours. I was worried that we would run out of topics to talk about but that doesn't seem to be the case.

I would also say that the ldr has helped us maintain our independence and identities. We don't completely rely on each other to fill the time. We still have hobbies, friends, routines and our own lives!

I've heard from others that the honeymoon phase seems to last longer in ldr. Because you never get used to being with the othet person in the same way. When me and my bf get to see each other we are more present and purposeful with our time spent together. We never take that precious time for granted. We've never fought because of that as well, why waste the little time we have on that?

I would also say that distance really tests whether both people involved are truly aligned. No one would get into a ldr if they didn't want it to last in the long run. It forces both people to really trust each other and give 100% for the relationship to work. You need to put so much more effort into it or else the relationship will die out. You can't compensate the quite nights with physical intimacy.

There are obviously many downsides to LDR's but why not talk more about the positives? Distance can really do a lot for a relationship as well!

I’m devastated. This very week I was suppose to be moving with their help. I just I don’t know how to feel okay with this. They pushed for it so hard, I worked for it so hard (legal stuff, moving logistics, saving money) I’m so hurt. I was so excited for our future. I know we had our differences but I was so happy to finally just focus on us. The busy mornings and quiet evenings. Cooking together, greeting each other after work. Hosting dinners, travelling together. I’m so heart broken. After everything I did to make it work, it’s like my effort got stomped all over along with my heart. The painful thing is, we still love each other, but I feel they’d rather remember me as a beautiful experience, than an uncomfortable commitment.

I’m currently in a long-distance(well medium I guess you could say it’s 4 hours by train) relationship with my girlfriend, and I honestly couldn’t be happier
We’re 18&19 (both female, wlw) rn so I’m just hoping for the best really as I haven’t been in healthy relationships EVER.

. She makes me feel a certain way I can proudly say I’ve never felt before and I was in and on and off relationship for 3 years before her,

I feel so cared for in ways I’ve always wanted, and I’m so grateful I met her. This sounds so corny but you get the gist.

We call every day, talk about everything and anything without it being awkward, I don’t usually get really comfortable or close to someone in such a short amount of time unless I know their going to be in my life for a long time, I got so close with her in a span of a couple days which is lowkey scary bc I’m a very self aware person so idek. I have no idea what I’m saying I’m just yapping atp about her.

We’re meeting in person for the first time in 12 days and she’s the first ‘online’ girl I’ve ever actually built the courage to tell my mom about. She’s gotten me a promise ring, keeps saying you’re not paying when I see you and I’m like girl no I am going to pay ( she works as a HCA) and I get she has money but I feel so bad everytime she decides to ‘ spoil’ me like it’s cute but girl. She’s already spent so much money on an uber just to come see me bc there were train railway replacements on the day we made plans to meet, I’m so grateful for that BUT SHE NEEDS TO STOP SPENDING SO SO MUCH MONEY at the ripe age of 19 tsk

, and as excited as I am to meet her for the first time I’m SO SO nervous, I keep thinking about what it’ll be like finally seeing her face-to-face, having our first hug, and actually being together instead of talking through a screen.

I know long distance can be difficult, and I’d love to hear from people who have made it work. How was your first meeting with your partner? Were you nervous too? Did things feel natural in person, and did your relationship survive the distance?

​My partner and I have been long-distance from the start (we were close friends for many years and recently decided to try being a couple), so we haven't had the chance to build a solid in-person foundation yet.

​He just spent 4 days staying at a close female friend's place. I was genuinely fine with it at first.

I have however been struggling with the long distance in general and told him about this.

On day 1 of him being there, I felt awful after work (for work reasons) and reached out to him via voice note (with a super flat tone), only to get ignored - he later said he thought I "sounded fine" and that he was probably too tired to notice my tone.

​Overall I had a crap weekend on my own. He texted me a few times, called me on day 3 because he probably felt bad that he didn't support me on Friday. Today (end of the 4th day) he told me about all the nice things he and his friend did together, which included lots of things he loves (cooking together, eating out, playing music he loves) and I suddenly didn't feel okay anymore, and told him I felt uncomfortable. I admit I felt a bit of a sore loser, especially since he insists he has 0% feelings for her and I believe him.

​Still, the discomfort is real. I tried explaining that my jealousy is just a symptom of the bigger issues: we are far apart, I felt unsupported on Friday when I was already feeling fragile, and I’m watching him share the exact kind of everyday intimacy with her that I wish we had. ​Instead of hearing that, he keeps probing the jealousy angle. He even asked: "If we lived together and I told you I'd go stay at hers, would you be jealous?"

​I didn't even know what to say. It depends on how secure I'd feel then, but part of me just wishes a partner wouldn't put me in that discomfort to begin with!

I also explained to him that my issue is not that I don't believe him or don't trust him. But that maybe he should have thought that sleeping at a friend's place for that long whilst in a relationship is not okay even if innocent. He started to worry about me being controlling and limiting his freedom. I don't think I am either of those...but do feel confused about boundaries and why boundaries which seem natural to me (not staying at a male's house having fun for days) don't seem natural to him.

​What's your stance on this?

A few months ago, I met a girl while on my first solo trip. It was in Spain, during a kayaking activity I had booked through GetYourGuide. We were the only two people who spoke English, so naturally, we started chatting. I had absolutely no ulterior motives, but she seemed like a cool person, so I asked her if she’d like to grab a drink.

It only took one evening, a few conversations in a bar, for me to feel that something was “different”. There was just something between us.

The thing is, I’m quite a rational person. After that lovely evening together, I thought it would be nice to stay in touch, without getting my hopes up too much, especially since she’s Polish. In my mind, at worst, it would be a nice encounter; at best, the beginning of a lovely long-distance friendship. Either way, we wouldn’t have been able to see each other again during that trip, as I was leaving the very next day.

But after I got back home, she started messaging me on Instagram, and we never really stopped talking. We gradually grew closer through calls, video chats, and gaming sessions together. I honestly don’t think a single day has gone by without us talking since we met.

Little by little, even though I was hesitant about getting involved in something potentially complicated, I had to face the facts: I was developing feelings for her. And, as it happens, she was actually the one who made the first move. I mean, how crazy is that?!

A few weeks ago, we arranged to meet in Paris, a sort of neutral ground between us. I’m French, but Paris is still quite far from where I live. We spent a few days together, and while there was already something strong between us at a distance, meeting in person took everything to another level. We’re officially together now, I’m really happy, and I’ve grown very attached to her.

When I’m in a relationship, especially at the beginning, my brain tends to focus on the negative and imagine every possible scenario in which things could go wrong. But the thing is, we just seem to click so well as people. In fact, this is the first time I’ve experienced such a natural connection in a relationship, whether it’s the way we communicate, how easily we talk to each other, or how comfortable we are discussing our feelings. We can talk openly about our doubts and fears, but, of course, also about how much we love each other.

Obviously, there’s still a little voice in the back of my mind wondering whether the distance might be hiding certain incompatibilities, or things about each other that we might not like if we lived in the same city and shared more of our everyday lives. After all, we’re still getting to know each other, and spending a few days together isn’t enough to discover everything about another person. But for once, I don’t want to let those questions take over. I want to believe that love can win! Haha, at least judging by some of the lovely success stories I’ve read on this sub.

It’s precisely because this relationship feels so beautiful and precious to me that I’m asking for your advice. I’m someone who never thought I could handle a long-distance relationship (let alone in English, since I’m not exactly fluent either!), and yet here I am, with someone I think is truly wonderful.

So, to those of you who are in successful long-distance relationships, or who have managed to make one work in the long run: What were your doubts? What mistakes did you make? What problems did you not see coming? And, most importantly, what advice would you give someone who genuinely wants to make this work but still has a tiny (really tiny, I promise, because I trust myself and the girl I’m with!) little fear in the back of their mind?

I’d love to hear about your experiences, whether they’re beautiful success stories or more difficult experiences you’ve learned something from. ❤️

What if you have known her for 6 months physically, and then had to do LD - it's been over 1,5 year now - is that too short to keep a LD alive?

What makes you decide to break up rather than keep trying, especially when you can't realistically close the distance for another 2-3 years because of career opportunities?

We were in a relationship for months and months before we dated and then met in person and spent a lot of time together. To be honest it was so natural from the “first” meeting. Just like I expected or better. But at the same time some challenges occurred and after a few weeks the “in person” gap felt and there were so many things we did by default that we assumed were ok ugh. However it was a great experience and I am so glad we took this step. Now we’re looking forward to the next meeting. How was your in person experience if you dated online first?

I can’t stop crying. We’re already long distance with the time difference of 2.5hrs, which is bearable and easy to manage, but now there is a huge possibility that he will temporarily move to the US in two weeks. This sets our time difference to a staggering 11hrs. 11 whole hours. We both have school so we’ll be busy and we will have less time to call. We already don’t have a lot of time to call (my boyfriend studies for 15hrs a day including college) so the only time we really get to call is at night for a few hours.

I know my situation is luckier compared to some as it’s only temporary, and he’s planning to move back in May (confusing circumstances) but there are so many “what ifs” circulating in my mind. “What if he finds someone new?” “What if we grow more distant?” “What if the timezones wears us out too much?” Obviously, like the amazing person he is, he reassured me—- told me that we would call during mornings and nights. Additionally, his schedule will be freed up a lot more (the American curriculum is much more lax & lenient than the Indian curriculum) so he actually has Saturdays & Sundays off. During the call I kept uncontrollably sobbing as he was listing off solutions. Although I do feel reassured and calmer after, I just can’t help but feel so empty and sad. Break ups are off the table—- that will never happen, so we will power through.

My boyfriend🇬🇧 and I🇯🇵 started dating in Japan, and after three months together, we lived together for about two months. We’ve now been in a long-distance relationship between Japan and the UK for around three months.

At first, we would talk on the phone for about 10 minutes every day, despite the time difference.

But gradually, communication became less frequent.
When I told him I missed him and wanted to see him, he said, “I don’t really miss you or feel the need to see you, but that doesn’t mean I want to break up.”

That made me feel insecure, but he still made time for short calls afterward.

However, last week he broke his ankle, and since then, we’ve barely communicated.
I reached out because I was worried, but he told me he didn’t feel like talking. So I replied, “Okay, message me when you feel ready.”

It’s now been five days, and he hasn’t read or replied to my message. Meanwhile, he still seems to be active on Instagram.

I want to respect his need for space, but I don’t even know how serious his injury is, whether he needs surgery, or if he’s feeling depressed because he might not be able to walk properly for a while.

I’m genuinely worried about him, but at the same time, I’m scared our relationship might slowly fade away without us ever officially breaking up.

Another issue is that whenever I try to discuss when we might see each other again, he says he doesn’t want to talk about it right now.

I’d love to visit him in the UK, but flights are expensive, and I need to plan around my work. He keeps saying he’ll let me know once he figures out his schedule, but it’s been two or three months without any real progress.

There’s also something else that’s been bothering me.
He has a close female friend who apparently stayed over at his place to celebrate his birthday with him.
I’ve met her once, and I genuinely think she’s a lovely person. I’m glad he has someone there to celebrate with him.

But at the same time, I felt sad and frustrated that I couldn’t be there to celebrate his birthday myself.
They’ve also travelled around Japan together before, and sometimes I catch myself wondering if there’s ever been anything more than friendship between them.

I have no evidence that anything inappropriate has happened, and I know it’s not her fault. I actually hate that I find myself having these thoughts.

I love him and genuinely want a future together.
I’m not asking for hours of phone calls every day. I just want something simple, like a call once a week or a short message now and then, so we can both feel connected and secure in our relationship.

What would you do in my situation?
Should I just give him space and wait for him to contact me, considering his injury?

For those who have been in long-distance relationships, how did you deal with communication becoming less frequent?

If we can’t communicate or discuss our future together, should I reconsider the relationship?
Thank you for reading

Hi!!

This girl and I have been friends for quite a while now, and we are now both interested in each other and like each other. I see her in just 2 weeks… However, I would really like to ask her out. I’m unsure if I should just wait to see her and ask her out as soon as I see her, or if I should just ask her to make things official now. I have a few gifts and a nice note to give her when I see her and I was thinking of asking her as soon as we meet up. If you were in my position, what would you do? And if you were in her position, what would you want me to do? Thank you so much in advance :)

So I'm in a relationship with a girl from the uk we are both bellow 18 and she has alot of mental issues and has been doing self harm alot ive been talking to her and trying to help her feel better and see what's wrong but she keeps doing it she keeps getting her stuff taken for hurting herself and the last time she had things taken she tried taking 60 pills of smt I wasn't told exactly but I made her tell someone so she could go to the hospital after getting out she stayed out till 12am and was drove back home by the police after getting then called on her for not coming home and they gave her phone to her parents and I have no way to talk with her and im worried if she tries to kill herself I won't be able to help her she's been gone since last Tuesday

We’ve been mutuals on Instagram for about a year, and in July, he came to NYC (where I’m from). He’s from Chicago and asked me out to dinner. We celebrated our birthdays together because they’re just a few days apart in July.
The connection was so special. It was the most fun date ever. The chemistry and compatibility were insane. We were both amazed and in awe of each other because he legitimately checked every box on my list for a future partner, and vice versa. I remember him telling me that we were going to fall in love by the end of that date, and he was right.
We spoke every day on the phone and spent so much time getting to know each other. Things moved fast because of how often we talked and how deeply we connected. When we first met, he spoke about moving to NYC, but while we were dating, he got a new job, and things changed. He became busier, and it was hard for us to navigate long distance together.
We saw each other about once a month. He came to visit me, and I went to see him just a few days ago. He told me that the more he falls in love with me, the harder it is to say goodbye. Long distance was really difficult for him. He expressed that he didn’t want to do it, but because he loved me, he was willing to try.
Ultimately, his needs weren’t being met, and honestly, I felt anxious all the time, too. It was hard for both of us, but ngl, if he had the fight in him, I would’ve kept going. Yesterday he told me how he didn’t want to lose me and I told him that’s no the same as choosing love. We had a game plan on making it work but apart of me loving him is seeing how hard it was for him and release him. We both know how different things could’ve been if we lived in the same city.
I’m heartbroken but also relived in knowing I’m not forcing anything anymore sucks we only lasted 3 months lol

My boyfriend and I have been in a LDR for 4 yrs now (we‘ve met when we were 16). We are currently having a really hard time with this distance and only being able to see each other 2-3 times a year. Each of us has a lot of future career plans and we would probably have to continue this distance for another 8 years before one of us could leave their home country. 8 years is really such a long time would you just go through with it finish your education and move together or give up parts of your plan?

Me and my boyfriend have been dating for 7 months, i leave in january bc im going to study in another city. (9hrs away). We decided to try to meet and be the same as we have been until january because we have the opportunity to. But we know we need to break up in january because i will be gone for 6 years and he is dtudying in another city. And he doesnt want long distance because he wants to settle down now and find a girl he can live with.

And i understand him 100%, but it just hurts so much that he doesnt want to try long distance with me, eventhough he can visit me and i can visit him. I dont understand if its something wrong with me, or if ive done something wrong and why he wont try for us. I need advice for if we should end it now or if we should continue until january. Also advice on how i will get over it. I know there is nothing that will change his mind, and hes told me before that he wish he could marry me and wanted to move with me if it wasnt for me leaving to study.

And will he miss me..??

I f22 play fortnite alot with him m20 and I was playing with one of our mutual friends (friend 1) and someone I didnt know (friend 2) while he was out with friends.

Friends 2 and I were joking around and talking shit to eachother and friend 1.

when my bf got back to his house I had texted him to see how everything went and he responded back kinda weird just saying he didnt drink when I asked him if he had fun.(which is a little weird just because I wasnt assuming that he was).

Onto the bigger issue I guess...

He joined the party and litterally didnt speak the entire time which is somewhat normal because he likes to listen to music and such, and we played a few rounds but he was playing like he really didnt want to play which I mentioned to him about how he didnt have to play if he didnt want too.....

which turned into him telling me that he didnt like how friend 2 was speaking to me and how he didnt know how I couldn't see it..

( we've talked in the past about How it it really hard for me to read people, let alone when they are flirting with me)

Which then he deleted the text saying that.

So i pushed and asked him like what did he mean because he knows that I have blocked people in the past for his comfort, because the only one I want in any situation is in fact my bf....

He then wouldnt really give me anything and told me to forget it, which upset me because he knows that if hes uncomfortable I will deal with the situation to make him comfortable, I did make a horrible comment about how I didnt ask all the insecure things I wanted to ask about him going out, because he didnt tell me what he did or who he was with but I didnt because I know I was being insecure.

-Sorry for the long read.. dont know how to summarize it... thanks for any support or advice

Me and my boyfriend have been together for 7 months now (not met irl yet since we live in different countries,) we sexted a lot in the beginning but it’s been hard for me to get into it for the past few months. I thought it was really fun when we did sext, but every time he tries to get something going i usually don’t feel much enthusiasm anymore.
And i have no idea why since I’m just as physically and emotionally attracted to him (if not more) since we started dating, It usually ends up with me responding with a pretty short message because i don’t know how to respond.
My boyfriend is really understanding and has never pressured me into sexting back, and changes the topic when he senses that I’m not into it. It makes me feel bad bc I want it to be as it was a few months ago when we could have fun and sext effortlessly.
I don’t know what I can do to get back into that headspace.

I’m a 26F and have been with my boyfriend (26M) for about three years. Ever since we met I’ve had the idea of moving to his country. At first, it was like a dream of mine and he just happened to come into the picture.

A couple years later and we’re still together. It has always made sense in every possible way that I’m the one who moves (and he has made it clear he is not ready to do that or could do anything in my country due to his profession). But for some reason, now that we’re looking into the visa process, I find myself questioning over and over if I will truly be happy there.

I love a lot of his country. I have had the pleasure of visiting it many times now, but I have also seen and heard a lot of stories of people moving there and their struggle to find housing, jobs, friends, etc. and for once, I truly like my life in my own country/city.

If you had given me the option to move 2-4 years ago, I would’ve done it in a heartbeat. But now… I’m not so sure. The thing is, part of me has always had that dream to live abroad. Yet, I’m soooo scared right now. I wonder if I’ll ever feel TRULY ready or if I have to do it despite not feeling ready.

I also know if tomorrow I woke up and I told him that I’m not ready (and I wouldn’t be in a couple of years) then I’d be seriously damaging the relationship. We’re both so tired of the distance. And I do want a life with him, it’s just the thought of me having to change every single aspect of my life to have that, that it’s not doing it for me right now.

I wanna hear your experiences and advice.