I am a 33 year old woman from the US. if I can give one person in my situation the courage to leave, this will be worth it. you can ask hard questions, but trolls will be ignored. I will be a totally open book!

Wasn’t sure if y’all get updates on my first post here. So I’m making a new one.

Preface to this is if you are on controlled substances already and need them you’re gonna need insurance.

All of this is from Tennessee groups but from what i gather most states get allotted money for programs.

2022, I had a mental breakdown. Spent time in the hospital and stabilized enough to get out without going all the way to a lockdown facility.

I knew of a place in my town for mental health. I went for an appointment. Met with physician assistants and a social worker to cover my own resources. What they could help with and where else to go.

In tn these offices have their own pharmacy. They have a state program for prescription where you “self report” your income and reduces all generic prescriptions to 3 bucks each at any pharmacy in tn.
They offer therapy and any mental health drug that isn’t a controlled substance.
Hell then they gave 10 buck gift cards for the Kroger across the street for gas at each appointment as well.

While there they discovered my hypertension and also want your blood work to get your mental health meds. Never required it but I needed the bp meds anyway so why not go ahead and get the stick too.

I go to health department get my bp meds and even they asked about my mental health before they knew I had been sent by volunteer behavioral health. Once again at the end of the visit “self reporting “ of finances.

Since I lost my job from the breakdown they recommended me another state resource which helped me pay a little more than a Months back rent. Paid off my gas and then almost a whole year of electric bills. Because they don’t split hairs on this month or that month. No they see what you owe and the average and it was like 600 for lower average and 800 for higher. Even if you just owed 200. You got the 6 or 8 based off of last year’s bill average. I slept in fucking jogging pants and shirts in winter with it about 62 in my house cause gas is awesome and 62 on a gas thermostat kept it 65 for me.. little colder at night.
Didn’t pay another bill till July/august.

Guys… pride is nothing. Fuck that pride. This is subsidized programs that they don’t advertise because they want that pride to tell you no.

I still get those psych meds today and still on the rx program.. because it’s already a line item. There is nothing to audit. I’m just a fish in the pond of the money.

I’m sorry tellreddit. I should have opened with the substance instead of the message.
It actually makes me happy that Redditors were mostly like tel me more than telling me gtfoh.

Everything in the United States is a market. Since with our fucked up end stage capitalism that any growth is growth for the market. Even subsidizing and donating medicine/ care. It’s still growth.

Now.. there is nothing I’ve found for dentist/hearing/ or vision. Except sometimes a few dental offices will do a free care day and people camp out for those appointments.. (land of the free amirite) and glasses from Americas best is like 100 bucks for two pair. Two pairs of glasses can last a minute if you’re careful.

I hope I can help.

It started raining while I was taking out the trash yesterday, and my neighbor's kid ran straight outside without a jacket. His mom yelled that he was going to get soaked, and he yelled back, “That's the point!” Then he started jumping around in the driveway. I mentioned it in to my friends on tribe chat later on because it made me laugh for real... Honestly, I hope he never loses that kind of excitement over the little things.

https://www.instagram.com/reel/Dc3b3uNhyMg/?mdxt=MW85djlxdGljcGt4dg==

Idk how to imbed this right I’m on a phone but here is your health insurance in a reel. It isn’t because it’s awesome for you.

There is something about turning 35 that made me feel like I need to really ask myself if I’m doing the things I want to do in life.

Early this year, several friends made plans to come visit my city for a local event. I cracked a joke that I’ll greet them on a motorcycle by the time they arrive in October, being the “cool local girl.” The joke being I’m a super dork with a desk job in reality. Initially it was just a bit. But the thought kept coming back to me each week

I’m not an “outdoors” person. I love being outdoors, but almost all my interests and hobbies require being in front of a screen. My job is in front of a screen every day. I draw cute little things and they go into your phone for your cute little games. I play cute little games and use an indoor cycle for exercise. Nothing about my lifestyle screams “cool motorcycle girl”

A few months passed, and I started looking at local MSF courses. The price to take a safety course and become endorsed was close to $500. Ugh. I didn’t want to commit just yet, but I started putting money aside

I kept asking myself if I’m just committing to a really elaborate bit or do I genuinely want to get into this hobby? I began reading more on biker safety, statistics, and the current state of motorcycle communities. I saw there’s a local women’s club for riders. Monthly hangouts. Groups for new kids. The more I researched, the more I liked what I saw

September comes around, and I bring up my riding curiosity to my manager. He seemed mildly surprised, but delighted. I decided to look up labor day sales for motorcycle gear and find a few pieces going for good discounts. I buy a helmet and boots. I’m really committing now

By this point, I’ve also changed my hairstyle to a shag with a deep undercut. I’m slowly acknowledging that my inner child wasn’t joking. The bursts of joy I’m feeling lately are at levels I haven’t felt in years. The velvety touch of the back of my head brings a smile to my face each time. I’m discovering parts of my personality I didn’t have the courage to reveal until now

I check the MSF course schedule and see there’s only one available slot left for the next few weeks, and it starts THAT night. I get out my wallet. The riding portion of the class starts at 6am sharp the following two days

I get my ass up at 4:30 and make it on time. They teach us everything about the bikes and how to get them moving. The rumble of the engine makes my heart flutter. We slowly get comfortable with our feet off the ground. I can’t believe I’m actually doing it

Two full days of learning how to ride and I pass the skills and knowledge test. I learned how to emergency brake, sharp turn, slalom, and emergency swerve. I can work the clutch without stalling. I didn’t drop the bike once. I’m feeling really good at this point and immediately start shopping for a used bike. I pick up a riding jacket with my MSF discount and finish the set with some armored pants

After about a week, I find a used Yamaha R3 for a decent price. The seller and I figure out a date to meet up so I can check it out in person. It’s beautiful. The owner managed to never drop it, and we go through the full inspection together to confirm. It’s three years old but rides like it’s new. I’m ecstatic and make the deal official. He rides it to my place and we finalize the title transfer

A couple days later, I go to the DMV and pass the final knowledge test. I leave with my M1 license, with two weeks to spare. All that’s left is to practice on my R3 until the event day

The day arrives, and I’m a bit nervous. I’m meeting some of my friends for the first time in person. They know I’ve been committing to this hobby for a while now, but I haven’t confirmed if I’m riding up. I decide to go for it

I follow all the rules of the road and stay as careful as possible on my way there. There were a couple quick stalls, but no serious close calls or scary moments. I’m feeling confident and cool as fuck

I get to the event and park on the street around the block. I’m just in time to see one of my friends host a panel. The panel goes great, I’m feeling so happy for them. I go to see another friend in the audience after the panel finishes, but my panel friend spots me and makes a beeline

“I saw you riding this morning. I got a video.” oh shit. His face is so gleeful, and now I’m worried

The event day goes by and we catch up and have a good time. My friend leaves sending the video to me for the very end. I end up riding home before I open the message. I check out the video

It’s me going a steady 25mph while his uber and another car crawl behind me. He’s giggling with his wife while I cruise along at the exact speed limit on this edgy sport bike. He messages me to say how proud he is of my cautiousness. I’m crying laughing. I look SO SILLY

Turns out you can put a dorky girl on a stylish bike and she will still manage to ride it like a dork

It's the best decision i've ever made.

it started off as just a spot for me to write corny messages but the longer i kept doing it, the more people resonated with the things i had to say, and the comments and DM's i've gotten have genuinely started to make my day.

i strongly encourage anyone who is feeling any type of way to just start a scratch tiktok account, throw on a black screen and just type how you feel, you might be surprised at how many people resonate with your feelings

One thing I’ve noticed is people feel awkward asking and checking in on someone who’s been trying for a baby for a while. They feel it’s “rubbing it in” or don’t want to make the person sad. As someone going through infertility now for 3.5 years: check in on those friends! It is such an incredibly lonely journey, and it feels like everyone is moving on in life and you’re stuck in this one spot, all consuming with infertility. When people don’t check in, I feel forgotten about and even more lonely than ever. I promise you, checking in will make that person feel included and remembered and cared for. If you aren’t sure, just ask them: would you prefer we never talk about this, or would you prefer I check in every so often? They will tell you. I’ve had a few friends who haven’t checked in (and I mean truly checked in) in over a year. And I’m pulling away from them now unintentionally, but I’ve told all my friends I appreciate the check in. So I feel like these few who haven’t are just too busy, or too sick of me going through this still. It’s not a nice feeling and I know they probably just feel awkward. But going through infertility has really shown who my true friends are. Who sticks around. Who checks in. Who truly asks how I’m doing and where I’m at, rather than a “how are you?” And when I say fine they say “ok good!” End of conversation. That’s not a true check in. Hopefully this helps a friend out there who has a friend going through it!!

​

I was at the grocery store yesterday evening when I realized a guy in his late 20s had been following me through almost every single aisle for twenty minutes. Every time I turned around, he’d pretend to look at a shelf. I was getting super uncomfortable and ready to flag down security.

​Finally, near the checkout, he walked up to me, visibly nervous, and said, "I am so sorry if this is weird, but I noticed you picked up ingredients for a specific curry back in aisle 4. My mom used to make that exact dish before she passed, and I’ve been trying to replicate the recipe for two years but couldn't remember the key spice. I was just trying to see what brands you bought."

​My heart completely melted. I stood there in the bread aisle for fifteen minutes, pulled out my phone, and gave him my family's exact step-by-step recipe.

​Never judge a book by its cover—sometimes a "creep" is just a guy missing his mom's home cooking

I work with animals and walk dogs. Today I was walking two of my regulars and waved to the new neighbors on their back porch with their 2 dogs. I looked straight and saw two loose ones in the road. I was scared to approach them because they might attack the ones I was walking and went back over to the neighbors. I said “hey there’s two dogs loose in the road can you help me?” The wife said i’m not helping you with dogs and went back on her phone and eventually the husband got up when the owners were already catching them. It just seems so weird. I don’t know if it was rudeness or what happened….?

its my birthday today and i always thought i hated it but lwk best day ever

For this one year people just stop. The price for this years premium will be less than you actually use.
Yes I know if you have major medical needs sure.. but if your a healthy single person or even young family. The health department works. Look for other ways to get care..
if you get cancer you won’t be able to afford it with insurance anyway.
One year. Stop.

If you gotta drop a couple grand a month for your family and y’all are healthy just don’t do it for this year.

Would y’all agree the system is broken?

Do you actually want to fix it or keep it the way it is..
they’re are hospitals that are going out of network for all marketplace insurance now. Only work cooped insurance.

So in history? It’s came down to boycotts and violence pretty much and since our whole nation is more armed than ever we are letting what 30k ice agents run amok? So I’m assuming the violence is out. Democrats win it’s still two years away before they can even make a bill. It will take one more year to implement the next set of subsidies and markets…

Or boycott your work program.. who owns the work program?
The same umbrella corporations you’re working for probably… rich people love the cyclical money racketeering.

So they pay you less money than your worth for the labor you put in, they make you pay for these “benefits” but say “oh it’s pretax” they still are profiting off your income to pay for these insurance companies they own. They tax you more than the billionaires making money off your labor/benefits.

And I promise dems talk a bunch of shit.. I am one, corporation will eventually get in the new 🆕 one’s pockets. Create a new subsidized market place and still keep their golden calf.

So, even if you have insurance now before the end of the year and having to sign up. Why not check out what is free in your states?

I had a mental breakdown in 2022. No job, no meds, almost lost my rental.

Let me preface the rest of this. If you need controlled substances for medical care you need to keep insurance because poverty systems will laugh at you for asking. Except for opioid treatment which comes in a 6 month grant.

Back to 2022

So I called a group in tn called volunteer behavioral health.
Set up an appointment to go see the office close to me.

You tell them what is up and then you gotta go see your counselor. They will not want verification of any of your finances. They want to help.

In Tennessee mental healthcare has a subsidy group called safety net.

I'm in Cockermouth right now; that is all.

It's just funny to me because I live in Illinois and we don't have place names like that

One time when I was about 14 years old (male) a news crew came to my school to film all of us kids sitting on a bleacher and we were supposed to hold up three fingers (representing the channel 3) and they were gonna put it on the end to close out the news hour.

I had just moved to this town and really didn't know anyone so I pretty much sat by myself. No one beside me or in front of me, more importantly.

So there I was. Sitting as a guy does. Knees out waving three fingers in the air like an idiot.

That night when we all day down to see if we could see me on TV. There I was. Looking like a geeky 15 year old. Waving my fingers. With a gigantic rip in the crotch of my jeans. My mom says oh my God!! Why did you wear your ripped up jeans??!! All you could see was my whitey tighty underwear bulging out of my jeans. And since no one was sitting near me I stood out like ... A guy showing his nuts on tv.

At the time I was mortified. Luckily it was a large enough school and I didn't know anyone so I didn't really get alot of shit about it. Except from my family anyway.

Just thought about that story and figured I'd share. Cheers yall

can’t tell what he thinks of me
I (18F) met this guy at a party and thought he was really attractive. A few days later, he showed up in my Snapchat Quick Add, so I added him.
He messaged me asking, “Do I know you?” I explained that Snapchat had suggested him to me. He asked if that was how I found him, and I said yes. I also asked him how his day was, and he replied, “Good, thanks for asking.”
After that, we started exchanging snaps, but we barely had actual conversations.
On the second day, I sent him a snap of the night sky. You could see a little bit of my hair in the picture. A few minutes later, he sent me a selfie of himself lying in bed. He was shirtless, with a blanket covering the rest of his body. You could see part of his face, shoulder, and upper chest. His room was dark, and he was using his phone light.
That was the only time he sent me a selfie like that during the entire time we were snapping.
The next day, I sent him a snap of nature. That same day, I saw him at Uhrfix with another girl. I know she wasn’t his girlfriend, but I don’t know what their relationship was.
We continued snapping after that.
At one point, I sent him a mass snap showing my hair with a filter, and he replied directly with a selfie using a baby hippo filter and a little smile. The next day, I sent a SpongeBob filter snap, and he replied with a picture showing only part of his hair.
Other times, I’ve sent him pictures of myself with filters as mass snaps, and he’s replied with random pictures, including one of a wall. He’s also sent pictures of his hair and black screens with his location attached.
We’ve been snapping for around 27 days, but we barely talk.
I also need to admit something about my own behavior. Sometimes I take three, six, or even nine hours to open his snaps. Sometimes I leave him on read and send another mass snap the next day. It’s not necessarily because I want to ignore him; sometimes I overthink what to send and want the picture to look good.
I have never directly told him I find him attractive. I’ve never confessed feelings or sent him an obvious flirty message.
There was also one awkward incident where I sent him a meme and then said, “Sorry, wrong person,” and apologized. He didn’t reply after that.
He still hasn’t removed me from Snapchat.
I keep wondering whether he thinks I’m interested in him, whether he finds me attractive, whether that bed selfie meant anything, or whether I’m just another random person on his Snapchat.
The frustrating part is that I genuinely find him attractive, and now I feel nervous even looking at his pictures. Sometimes this whole situation makes me feel ugly, even though I know I shouldn’t let a guy’s behavior determine how I feel about myself.
I don’t know whether he was flirting that one night, casually snapping me, or simply sending whatever pictures came to mind. I also don’t know whether he has thought about this interaction nearly as much as I have.
I’m honestly tired of analyzing every little thing. One day I think the bed selfie meant something, and the next day he sends me a picture of a wall.
So, Reddit, I want honest opinions:
Does this sound like he was ever flirting, or was it just casual Snapchat behavior?
Based on my actions, would you assume I had a crush on him?
Is keeping someone on Snapchat for almost a month actually meaningful?
Am I overthinking this because I like him, or is there genuinely something confusing about this interaction?
Would you stop snapping him and move on, or would you ask him directly what he thinks?
Please be honest, but I don’t want people pretending they can read his mind. I just want an outside perspective because I’m exhausted from trying to figure this out myself.

I found a box of over 100 games in the closet ranging from NES to PS3 and Xbox and everything inbetween and also i have the consoles that are needed for the games ive never felt so lucky before

What other AI music generation app will let me generate covers of any songs with famous voices? (MyTunes removed that feature which was the entire reason why I had that app.)

Why did they remove the AI Cover feature? What other AI music apps will still let me generate covers of any songs with famous voices?

I thought it was hilarious to make Trümp's voice sing a bunch of random songs I liked. I need to be able to generate that again, thanks.

I love hearing new perspectives and on anything really. Dm me!

After looking at all queens of Europe back in 1869 this is my ranking
Empress Elisabeth of Austria 9
Empress Maria Alexandrovna 3
Empress Augusta of Saxe-Weimar-Eisenach 5
Empress Eugénie de Montijo 7
Queen Maria Pia of Savoy 1 (this is so fucking scary)
Queen Louise of the Netherlands 2
Queen Marie Henriette of Austria 6
Queen Louise of Sweden and Norway 3
Queen Olga of Württemberg 5
Queen Amalie of Oldenburg 7
Princess Elisabeth of Wied 5-6
Queen Isabella II 0 (she is not a queen no longer but she is the reson I started this list, I think she could be a little better than Maria Pia if it wasn't for her looking like a serial killer)
Queen Victoria 10 (the best of them all)

Some people belive we get to choose our life before we are born. We choose our parents and our life events and then we are born. Idk I believe that but I’ve always wondered why the hell did I pick now to be alive. But now I think I understand. I’m old now but I’ll get to see the Ai Revolution but I’ll not live long after it.

Be happy! Smile! Let your good energy shine! Fuck it all! 😂😊

Mom has passed, and her little brother (age 82) is about to die. I know Mom loved him a ton, but the one and only experience I had with him as an adult proved he's racist. He's dying right now. I'm not really sad. Racism aside, I wouldn't be too sad anyway, as I don't know him well. I feel badly for his kids, but really, why should I be upset at a racist dying? I wish his family well, but the one and only time I saw him as an adult, his racism was front and center. I feel like such a phony texting a couple cousins about how sad this is. I am ambivalent.

Where is your true American running for this spot? What’s up with that?

If dude was a Dem he would be getting the Omar treatment without a doubt

3 wives later. I guess this is what getting old is gonna be like yeah? Well it fxcking sux ass . Enjoy your youth and if you’re thinking about
Leaving someone over petty shit, like they snore or don’t put the toilet seat down, you better have another think internet strangers .

Chat gpt ain’t gonna give it to any clearer then that .

​

TLDR: I used to have it all and ruined my life by having a baby with a man I hardly knew .

Today is day 600 because 600 days ago today I purchased my phone. I know that not because im some insane nerd but because it tells me how many days ive had my phone on the inbuilt step counting app.

What I would give to go back to day 1.

Even day 390 things could have been reversed .

But at day 600 I am stuck.

Ive been stuck since day 390 in this life that... bizzarely I chose. And has turned out to be so woefully wrong for me. But there is no rewind button.

Let's go back to day 1.

Back then I was an attractive 28 year old lawyer with the world at her feet. A lovely flat to live in. 6 holidays a year.  Good friends and colleagues. Family nearby. An exciting job which thrilled me. And many admirers to pick from. I had no idea how lucky I was back then.

2025 will always be the year my life changed forever. Until then, whilst there had always been challenges , life was generally heading in an upwards trajectory.  I was progressing in my career, becoming more confident, travelling more and getting better looking.

But in 2025 I made a series of choices which caused.... a nose dive.

Back then I was obsessed with dating apps. Addicted perhaps. No matter how busy I was, I always made time for dates.

But most dates were boring. Often because I'd have spoken to the person lots online before we met, so we already knew everything about each other.

In hindsight, I didnt even need dating apps. I had enough admirers IRL .

In May 2025 I fired up an app called breeze , which prevents that very issue as you cant talk until 2 hrs before the date. The app arranges the date for you and you pitch up.

10th may 2025 was a "canon day".

I remember waiting for my on/off love interest of 6 years respond to me about meeting up. In my head, id decided if he did , I'd bin off the breeze date I had organised. But he said he was "busy". Sick of having been messed around and heartbroken for 6 years, I thought F you i am going to go on this date.

So thats what I did and the trajectory of my life changed forever.

I dont agree with dating apps now. They cause people to meet who shouldn't have met. They effectively interfere with fate.  And in my mind that is what has happened. My life from that date has been... off piste.

So the date went well..very well. The man in question wasn't my usual type, but in my mind things hadn't worked with my "type" thus far so why not give something else a go! We had lots of surface level commonalities and a great laugh together. The date lasted until the last train home and we immediately started texting afterwards. He made huge efforts organising subsequent dates to fancy places in London and even a date to a theme park despite a personal family tragedy.

He made huge efforts to come to see me.

All the while my 6 year love interest was trying to get me back. But I gave him the cold shoulder and eventually cold heartedly.. blocked him.

To cut a long story short, we moved in together in the October and by the end of the November I found out I was pregnant .

For reasons I cannot now fathom, I thought having a baby with a man who I had only known a few months was a... good idea! (Spoiler: it wasnt).

The pregnancy itself was hell. I had hyperemsiis and was sick every day for 9 months. During the pregnancy, serious incompatiblities began to show.

He is inherently messy, I am tidy. He has a bad8 temper, I find that frightening. Im a crier and he has "no time for that". He has to watch his pennies and I like to be treated like a princess. He is very wrong for me on every level . That is the uncomfortable truth. We will never be compatible because we are so different.  But despite gradually realising all the above, I kept the baby.  I didnt have to. I live in the UK. The abortion limit is 24 weeks.

Since my daughter was born in July everyday has been immensely difficult. I tried to move away from my partner but couldn't cope alone and now im admitted to a psych ward (with baby). I have no clue when ill be released snd when I am in have to live with my baby dad as im not allowed to live alone..so im stuck with this messy man who I dont really get on with even for the long run. I think we both know if it weren't for our daughter the relationship would have ended some months ago.

Baby is a beautiful healthy baby girl who i love dearly but feel guilty that i was so selfish to bring a baby into the world in these chaotic and unfortunate circumstances.

I am only 29 and my life is over.